Date the Internet

Thirty and flirty, suave and sexy Clean bill of health and fabulous wealth and somehow this catch remains on the shelf I want to meet a super sexy refined lady Hit all the bars and discotheques, but I ain't found my baby My bro found me crying into a frappe mocha latte He said man up, come join the Internet dating party Within minutes I'm online, loading up Yahoo Searching through the dating sites, yeah girl I'm searching for you Time had come to hand select my profile photos Luckily, I'm a visual treat from head to toe Lead with a picture of me with a tiger in Thailand That's right ladies, I'm an exotic rugged manly, male, man Second photo sees me leaning against my car Yeah that's right love, it's a Diesel turbo XKR Oh woops, photo three's caught me in the gym Sorry babe, but benching is my unashamed sin And I'd bet you'd love photo number four I don't blame you girl, I always leave them wanting more My profile primed it's time to serenade a beautiful lady Filters set for slim brunettes, one decade junior to me And whoa this doll sure has one spicy jpeg And closer inspection revealed a lot of sexy, sexy, leg Having wooed fair maiden I'm out on date number one But wait she's not as pretty as her pictures, I've been done When questioning her photos authenticity She said let's just enjoy our night and see what could be It was clear at that moment that she lacked class And again aesthetically for me, she was a real pass Some gals they're hooked and won't take no for no But then who wouldn't want a second ticket for this gun show Back on the site and holy heck that girls got one hot gif And sure as sure she digs my conversational riff So here I am out on date number two Champagne cocktails, avec roof top views Hair tossed back, she's loving, my bants and my buns And it's clear she's bang up for some risqué fun But wait each time she laughs, she's letting out a snort Such a shame, as she's a real sort But when you're a renowned bantasaurous You can't live life in fear of a snorting goddess So back on the site, looking for miss right I see a lady who looks an absolute delight Like a legend I ask if she's free tonight And let's just say, she didn't put up much of a fight Out on the date post a quick crack, back and sack We're at an oyster bar, but I'm the main aphrodisiac I knock off her ankle boots with my award winning patter As if this player would ever deceive to flatter This sexy chica, really is as hot as hell And I can tell the other guys are getting well jel What a night and we sure are getting on great But then she reaches for a piece of food from my plate Wait pump the breaks, what are you doing mate Unforgivable, so I had to end our date Understandably she was totes emosh But boy this bird was oh so very gauche Back on the site, I'm building out my dating CV When your this guy, there's always plenty of fish in the sea I know this awesome Adam will find his Eve Cross your fingers it could be you, yeah girl just believe So don't worry babe, don't be feeling blue I'm still searching the sites, yeah girl I'm searching for you Oh, I'm searching for you Oh, I'm searching for you For you