Keeping Tabs

Wonder what you’re up to It’s been long enough Unblock your number, what’s the harm? You can’t fool me Try to slip open the door For her, 'cause them bad habits feel They feel I’ve been Looking over your shoulder Creep on your social A couple profiles, I hope you don’t notice See a mention of your loneliness and Know it isn’t, just me missing Our coalition, coexistence, even though it was the right decision See you mentioning that you're on Tinder, I’m feeling sideswiped See you missing us singing in the rain that comes to my eyes Whether I see you’re happy or not, these 3 months been passing us by I emailed you, didn’t feel like we haven’t chat in a while But like trying to rekindle ashes and I can’t recall how we used to speak I remember we used to speak like it was all between you and me And I’d go read our messages, just to rediscover the cadence But reading from the bottom up, it’s just the breakup then the breaking And you pleading me to have a little more patience Take some baby steps, and baby we’re gonna make it When I couldn’t stand it 'til day end Spent our vacation with the plans we made When my love hadn’t faded from your beratement Lying in bed and to your face like I didn't really hate you (That trip) I don’t think I held your hand once, I don’t think I called you baby ever The only exception being sex And if that’s all that’s left then we probably should’ve got the message And we did You purged me from your records But you know where to find me, and I'll still read your sermons Tried to remember your voice a couple weeks back, already had trouble Looked through your Insta seeking vids of you speaking, I’ve been erased Like we weren’t even ever a couple Fucking crazy bitch, the rage always threatens to bubble when I reminisce All that’s left there is my photo credit, I’m so pathetic Trying to see me in your history books 'cause all I fear is being forgotten By the one that gave me Stockholm Defending you to my friends, like I gave you reason for leaving me hollow And I didn’t even, tell them everything Cause I didn't want them to see you as the enemy, as you'd begun to see them Holding it all inside me while you’re holed inside the home alone An ocean away in the homeland, I had come to see then Neither of us were in a good place, you made sure I felt your pain Stalking your photos, slowly getting filled with rage But mostly comfort at your face It’s times like these it feels like this is all a break You just feel right Close the tab, but I’ll be back in seven days You asked to call I need to hear your voice But our calls always showed us, how far apart we were