Fear

Visions of my children wiping tear from open eyes As they Kneel beside my coffin family say their last goodbyes But ita the faces of my babies got me trippin' thankin' god for breath Expressions filled with pain has got me strappin' on the vest And I know that I ain't living right I hang on borrowed time And this life's gone leave them bastards cause they pops has got to grind Little mouths have got to eat so I hug them hit the streets Spittin' time with them and money got me feelin' incomplete And I ain't scared of any motherfucker fight the flames of hell But a child without his dad has got me hiding in my shell Got me shikin' in my boots to see them face this world alone Are the strong enough to cope stuck in half a fuckin' home As I lay them down to sleep its all on me their soul to keep And if I die before I wake I pray to God he's up there waitin' With an army full of angels strapped with gats cause I'm defying Since I first became o father only fear I have is dying This situation has got me losing sleep I can not eat I'm feeling weak the fear has got me On my knees The fear has got me This situation has got me losing sleep I can not eat I'm feeling weak the fear has got me On my knees The fear has got me After all that I have ever done And all that you will ever see for life Death beyond the grave How will they remember me I only fear the lost of my voice When its gone The only noise is the pen I'm a writer by choice I can cut my tongue clean off And smoke myself toothless I still be on the mic Spittin' shit they call ruthless The truth is I go deaf dumb and blind in one ear And be the dopes deaf dumb blind guy you ever hear I ain't scared of dyin Death I've been there The pine box for many years My return ain't bull ain't no reincarnation Get lost in translation This situation has got me losing sleep I can not eat I'm feeling weak the fear has got me On my knees The fear has got me This situation has got me losing sleep I can not eat I'm feeling weak the fear has got me On my knees The fear has got me Eyes open but I don't remember much I try to focus but the light is bright as fuck I go to sit up but I'm strapped and stuck Stuck panic can't say nothin' Like my jaw is wired shut How the fuck did get to where I am is still a mystery My memories not assistin' me As I lay here in misery Literally hopin' some body would give me some kind of time I'm I dead of alive Is this a dream or a sign Is there a chance I can find my mind and rewind But paint me behind blinds and find somethin' Its like a game but nobody told me we were playin' And the fact that I don't know if I'm alive and sane And inside my brain only one thing remains The fear of no knowing paralyzes all most everthin' An second can be my last breath And my best guess is nothin' with on memories left I'm sorry This situation has got me losing sleep I can not eat I'm feeling weak the fear has got me On my knees The fear has got me This situation has got me losing sleep I can not eat I'm feeling weak the fear has got me On my knees The fear has got me