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Schäffer: Ok, I can do this it won't be like
Last time this one will be different come on
Man get it together you can do
This you CAN do this

Madame
Schaffer the Darklord
Fucking Schaffer the Darklord
I god I just- I hate that guy so much
I'm going to write him a letter and tell him
Dear Schaffer
Schaffer: Hello, Schaffer
Erin: Hi, I'm Erin
Schaffer: Erin? It's a pleasure
To meet you Erin
Erin: Oh, likewise! I'm a big, big fan!
And let me just
STD: Oh hey guys

FRONT: Hi, Schaffer

STD: What are you all doing here?

FRONT: I think you better sit down

STD: Are you kidding me?

JESSE D: No,
(I Am Schäffer) (I Am Schäffer)

Aaaahh o-o-o-ooohh
Under an evil sun, on an evil rock
In an evil land an evil land
Impaled an evil woman with
games keep me from stressing
I guess I must say
Many screens I need to feel rested oh no

My name is Schaffer
(hi, Schaffer) and I'm an addict (oh no)
Hey, MC Lars! What's that, Schaffer?
We're making the band! Yeah!
Literally

Lars that's-that's a good pun
In an attempt to assemble
The ultimate
Hell raiser, he’s a gun blazer
Got big dick syndrome, better call Schaffer’s
Better call the races, rigged game
Kocaine no losses can’t think
the family
When Jocko got a job with the county
It was time
To move the Schaffers into Corning
It was ‘59
And Buddy was a teen drawing hot rods
Listening
Little Schaffer grew up sheltered
In a plant state farm town
Smaller and weaker than all his classmates
Deep into his fantasies he'd
Go when they'd attack
My name is Ralph Schaffer that used to mean somethin' round here in this valley of Farms
Growin' cabbage and corn and barley for Anheuser beer  a man
ten dollars
If you can't afford it now
Send me an electronic holler
Sign my mailing list, and later on, log on
To my website
It's Schaffer the Darklord
concert, ladies and gentlemen!
This goes out to Mr schaffer, who
Is so heavy at Down Beat
Who was our go-go boy the
Last time we were here may the Lord have
ago
His mom's sick now so he takes care of
Her and the rest of the family the oldest
He lives with them in a little
House on Schaffer in Detroit
I live
Und er muss rumdoktern um den kleinen Song noch zu retten

Dann releast ihr stolz den Track
Eure Leistung ist voll Wack
Die wahren Schaffer sind
pushing more keys
Than Paul Schaffer set for action
Smashing chickens with fat culos
Beatnuts and Screwball here to do y'all
Like that, baby what
Yo,
start with Mega Ran and my mega man Lars
Schaffer the Darklord, realytcracker
And beefyness of course 'cause they're all my favorite rappers
Sending
or hit up
KTP or maybe Schaffer the Darklord

Buckets and buckets
And fucking buckets and buckets of blood
It's coming down, it's really coming down
I'd like to bring in my good friend
He goes by the name of:
Schaffer the Darklord!

This is how you die on the Internet
Where your irrelevance is
pounds
Schäffer the Darklord!

Let me tell you people something right now
Shut up until I put this mic down
And lay waste to every act in the game
Then
Schaffer: Yo, Kristybee! What up, son?
Kristybee!: Yo, STD! What up, girl?
STD: Let's do this!

STD: B-B-B-B-B-Boys will be boys
KB: Will be boys,
sounds nice, I'm loud and clear
Ready to get down in here, what up, Schaffer?

Hit you like it's Godzilla
Giving you high-fives
I've rocked a lot
The opener has come to open up tonight

Last name Darklord, first name Schaffer
But everybody's always misspelling that shit
When they're listing it up in
I'm getting greater
Feeding off what's left of these Niggas they came later
Lit like Ben Schaffer
My pen to paper
I let her win
Time will tell

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