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Andie Mechanic

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I dont have the nightmares I had when I was thirteen and lucid dreaming
Didn't know about anything back then
Got lost in a sea of 3 w's
Looking up pictures of prostitutes
Thought that was what i was supposed to do
Tried to love how i look now
Tried to love how i look now
But i've never been good at lying to myself
Never been good at trying to get help
Never confided in anybody, even my own head
I don't have the opinions I had when I was thirteen and stroking bones in bed
Back then I was sucking down what satan said
And I know I crossed every line there was
Tried two more times and almost died
But that's dramatic, and I knew it was
(Ooo and I'll only do it one more time)
Tried to love how I look now
Tried to love how I look now
But I've never been good at lying to myself
Never been good at fighting for my health
Never confided in anybody, even my own head
And I got lied to by the internet again
I didn't want to, but I killed my only friend
Cause I was jealous, mad, and begging her for one more try, to cut me down to size
But she said "babe, I wasn't permanent"
Tried to love how I look now
Tried to love how I look now

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