1 Day

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oddFelix

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One day, you'll realise that everything you feed you with leaves you hungry
Maybe you'll change your mind
Maybe you'll change church
Maybe you'll change school
Maybe you'll change address
Or maybe you'll assume you can cope with where you are
That day, you'll reopen closed doors and try to reset already set standards
Maybe you'll try to build back some bridges you burned
Maybe you'll dig some graves you once cemented
You'll even try to make sense out of some quotes you doubted
But you'll surely do something
You'll begin to question your truths
Doubt your faith, fear your boldness
Rearrange your house
In some cases, you'll shut your doors to visitors
That day, you'll know you're in for a long ride
You'll wish you never knew what you knew
You'll appreciate ignorance and pray for it's bliss
You'll see that you can't do the things you want to do because your something has control of
You
You'll find yourself paralyzed before the tasks that bow to you
That day, you'll not be sure of anything
You'll advice your children as a suggestion
Pray for your needs with faith in whatever outcome you'll get
You won't even know if putting your right foot in front of your left is best
And your friends will suggest you go to a psych
That day, you'll know what it feels like to be in a bottomless pit
You'll start a journey without end
Or with an end you can't see
Yes, you'll take some steps and begin to doubt the light at the end of your tunnel
The way you see the world will change
You'll doubt the love of your parents
Fear the gift of your friends
Appreciate the hugs from your enemies
You'll even sleep with wolves, ignoring if they have sheepskin or not
That day, or the next, or the next
But one day, you'll make life changing decisions
Maybe you'll create new year resolutions and hope to keep to them, maybe you'll not
Maybe you'll find Christ
Maybe you'll remarry your wife
Maybe you'll resign, maybe get another job

You'll conclude that you're actually no longer yourself
Maybe you'll miss breakfast
Maybe your friends will say you no longer give them attention
Maybe you'll be depressed, even contemplate suicide
Maybe you'll attempt it once, maybe you'll fail
You'll have a lot of options before you
Maybe you'll pick one and damn the consequences
Maybe you'll choose many to be on the safe side
Maybe you'll pick none and watch how it will play out
No answer will be adequate for you
Books will seem like lies
The preachers will be questioned
And you'll begin to pick out loopholes in the stories history present to you
What if it's not how it seems, you'll ask
What if there's something I'm missing, you'll ask
What if we are blinded?
And you'll begin to care more
Maybe you'll give a damn about everything people say
Maybe you'll give an F about everyone that comes your way
Maybe you'll even make an attempt at perfection, as excellence will seen dissatisfactory to
You
Maybe you'll play God, even knowing the number of the hairs on your head
Maybe you'll speak out
Maybe it will be embarrassing when you do
Or maybe you'll decide to deal with it yourself
Maybe you'll watch more of TV and hangout with friends at every opportunity you get just to
Clear your mind
Maybe you'll sleep more because every moment you spend awake leaves you stripped of
Comfort
When this day comes
Everything about you will change
Or maybe just some things
Or maybe nothing at all
Maybe the changes will be noticeable
Maybe they will not
Maybe you'll tell us your if this ever happens to you
Maybe you'll not
Maybe this day will come for you
Maybe it will not

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