Somewhere In The Yard

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Splatterhouse

Splatterhouse is a beat 'em up arcade game developed and published by Namco. It was the first in a series of games released in home console and personal computer formats. This cult classic would later spawn the parody Splatterhouse: Wanpaku Graffiti, the sequels Splatterhouse 2, Splatterhouse 3, and the remake Splatterhouse U.S., with the classic games being added to Namco Museum since 2017. Marketing for the game heavily emphasized its violent nature; for example, the TurboGrafx-16 port of Splatterhouse had a faux parental advisory warning printed on the front of the box that read, "The horrifying theme of this game may be inappropriate for young children... and cowards." more »

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Somewhere in the yard exactly where I cannot say
Are two mormon missionaries buried in a shallow grave
Rapping at our door in the early morning light
We had just returned from the graveyard and were about to call it a nite

I invited them inside to join us for a cup of brew
My offer they accepted but the brew they refused
They began to sermonize about how we can be saved
By bringing god into our home they threw us into a rage

We showed them how salvation comes with a sledgehammer and a blade
For the rest of the day we tore off their limbs and pale skin we flayed
Then buried the half dead maggot worn in a shallow grave
We had not heard a word of this, that is until today

On days of intense heat a foul odor does arise
The stench would gag a maggot, we are forced to deodorize
The wind carries the scent of something gone away
Suspicions are aroused our neighbors turn a prying eye

The sheriff came a knocking with complaints of our dwelling hole
The nasty smell I explained as compost
He asked to take a look inside, satisfy curiosity
I felt obliged to grant his wish, We could use some company

As you guessed he did not last long, we cannot help ourselves
For those who approach with ill intent become subjects of our sordid tales
Sickle, pick and shovel we each take one in hand
A midnite mass mosh in the dark to til this rotten land

A treasure trove of organs, bone combined with putrified flesh
Under the wrong conditions produce a noxious gas

The soil rich and goretified from years of organic decay
Body farm of sorts, decomposition in all states
For the local cats and dogs we provide a fancy feast
They help destroy the evidence, we give them fresh killed meat
We give them fresh killed meat

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