Contact Light (feat. JACELYN)

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Colton Belley

2:56

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A-l-l-live
A-l-l-live
A-l-l-live
A-l-l-live
I can feel my heart thumping through my chest with force
Hands grasping a mug that smells like sweaty socks
And lemon lime, and ginger shreds
Hoping I don't end up kissing porcelain
I told myself I would never touch this shit
But f*ck this shit, I don't give a f*ck anymore
So bottoms up and choke as the warmth coats my throat
Lay staring at the ceiling to see if it'll morph
Listening t'Indian music as the fluids take over
Anxious as all hell I wait for the fallout
Pace to the washroom and stare at my face awestruck
Like: "is that me?"
Last I checked I was six spreading Lego in my bedroom
Now I'm in a uni dorm inspecting my pupils in my reflection
Grinning wide
While my face dances
'til I remember I'm hanging at my man's place
I stick my head out the door and walk in like "it's all good"
Get his pen in my palm and start scribbling my thought stream
Then.. shit. These letters slip effortlessly
Every thought I think has layers of depth I never cared to see
The moment's so real I feel like I've never lived
Yo fucking hell
I understand everything
So, this is real
Don't be afraid
Look in the mirror
It all can change
Head up to the sky, yeah
And let it go, let it go
And be alive
It's your birthright to be alive
Al-i-i-i-ive
What the f*ck am I expecting to go on here, cross-legged
Sitting on a bench like I'm Gandhi, watching
Joggers pass as the sun rises
Eye lids looking like a raccoon on Vyvanse
It's not like God's gonna save us
I'll wake up stranded in the same spot
Face judgement same as since day one
Say nothing, walk the path they laid down
But that shit doesn't work
I got the girl, got the grades, made a mint from stunts
Did all I thought it'd take and I'm still alone
What's the point of faking it if I just kid myself
Now I'm at the waterfront like an asshole
Staring at a blank page in a notebook
I thought I'd be the shit, I was hopeful
I scribbled in a thing and it goes
I've got no sleep, no peace, I can't cease to be me
I keep running from reality, it keeps coming right back to me
I'm at war all the time in my mind and I hate it
I can't take this anymore, I just want to escape it
Yeah
Yeah
Yeah
So, this is real
Don't be afraid
Look in the mirror
It all can change
Head up to the sky, yeah
And let it go, let it go
And be alive

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