I Really Thought You Loved Me

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Astrapiia

3:19

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I am broken
I wish that I could forget
The way you held me closely
The smile you had around me
Cause I really thought you loved me
Now I'm seeing you thought nothing
All this pain has been so numbing
I just wanna feel that something

Yeah I never thought you'd do this
Break my heart you acting heartless
Did it hurt you when you left us
Did you forget all that we were
Cause I'm thinking
Baby how'd you make it simple
Lately, feel like you didn't
Relate to what I was feeling
And now I'm asking how'd you go and leave me
How'd you make it seem so easy
Shatter my life into pieces
Almost like you didn't see me
Never thought you'd be so careless
Empty words to fill the air
You lied to me for way too long
And now I

I am broken
And I'm begging that I forget
All the ways you held me closely
And the smile you had around me
Cause I really thought you loved me
Now I'm seeing you thought nothing
All this pain has been so numbing
I just wanna feel that something
I wanna keep asking questions
Cause I'm drowning in what-ifs
But I don't need the answer
Yet I can't cut you off, oh
My mind revolves around you
My heart dissolves in your hands
All the feelings that we had
Always running through my head

Hearing this I'm pale
Baby feeling this betrayal
Has my questioning who you are
Who you were
And how you played me
Made my think I'd settle down
You had me comfortable around you
Everything made sense, it all made sense
Back when I had you with me

Yeah I know that love ain't simple
But you made it seem so easy
Now I understand that feeling
Broken heart in need of mending
Damn I never felt this lonely
Never had too many friends
Never was too close with family
It was you that filled that void
And now it's you avoiding me
I don't know how you seem so happy
Don't you know how you made me feel
Why did you leave so many things here
Taking your time to come and take them
House so full but feeling vacant
Like you don't care how I'm feeling
Like this didn't end last weekend
Open wounds I'm keeping hidden
Walls are built with my distractions
I don't wanna talk about it
Why does everyone keep asking
Even I don't have an answer
Everything has been confusing
Dizzy mind is always racing
Pacing thoughts and I felt that weakness
Never been in a place so hopeless
Filled with thoughts that I couldn't cope with
Troubled mind so filled with commotion
Thoughts so loud I'm deaf to the crying
Beg for relief a lasting silence
When I wake it feels like a bad dream
You know the kind when they can't hear you screaming

Can't tell if I am much better
I'm pushing away the thought of you, memories
Feels like I'm losing you more and more every day
Faking this smile I know it's the only way
Seeing your face and I see that I'm filled with pain
How do I go on don't know if I'll trust again
You took a part of me how can it be replaced
This happened twice and now

I'm broken
And I'm begging that I forget
All the ways you held me closely
And the smile you had around me
Cause I really thought you loved me
Now I'm seeing you thought nothing
All this pain has been so numbing
I just wanna feel that something
I wanna keep asking questions
Cause I'm drowning in what-ifs
But I don't need the answer
Yet I can't cut you off, oh
My mind revolves around you
My heart dissolves in your hands
All the feelings that we had
Always running through my head

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