The Babysitter

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This is a very true and very real story
So take a seat
And take a listen

Baby girl, I was 9, you were 17 and fine
You were looking after me, always having best of times
Shakespeare outdated, love was upgraded
Never missed a birthday, nothing happy belated
$25 a night, piggybank getting tight
But I'll keep mowing lawns if it keeps you in my sight, nah
Money over bitches, nah, money for my honey, yeah
Cuz everytime we meet, sky's a little more sunny
Always and forever, but our parents say never
The way we disguised it was oh-so-clever
Robbing the cradle, the moral of this little fable, pay the
Cash upfront, love under the table

My babysitter, she's a pretty cool lady
Type of girl, like to get crazy
Nah, she ain't sittin' on babies
No, no, no, no

My babysitter, she's a pretty cool lady
Type of girl, like to get crazy
Nah, she ain't sittin' on babies
No, no, no, no

Gotta Full House, Danny Tanner
Moves like Jesse, pardon my manners
Now I'm falling fast, love like quicksand
Got addicted, gotta get my fix, man
My boys doggin' me, saying that I'm gonna fail
But throw me a bone, I got no need to chase tail
Seabiscuit, expecting me to win the race
Like Popov, I'm all about the chase
Like Jordans, my bitches covered in lace
Call me Hoover, cuz I'm tryna suck face
Like a bad check, myself I had a void
But being with you, I'm always overjoyed
Noise outside, I'm getting paranoid
Approaching the house, a man on steroids
Thought it was true love, work of Cupid
But since he came over, I feel so stupid

Man, you let her do you like that. She played you man. I was 9 dude
Gimme a fucking break. True, true
Hold up, lemme tell you what I did next, I got her real bad

Sent to bed early, broken hearted
Time for damn payback, revenge plot started
9-1-1, said, "Help! A stranger"
"Like a White Rhino, I'm endangered"
As they messed around, I turned out the power
Cuz little did they know they hit the darkest hour
Looking out the window, cops pulling in
Like Bane to Batman, "Let the games begin"
Police bust in, yeah, with dogs and guns
Two of 'em popped up, dude tried to run
As the dude got caught, out popped a bag
It was full of white powder and some dirty rag
And his ass got cuffed and sent to jail
But in 10 to 15 he got a chance for bail
So the bitch got fired and she on parole
Now it's on to the next, I'm back in control

Dammit Brian, I had things to do today

My babysitter, she's a pretty cool lady
Type of girl, like to get crazy
Nah, she ain't sittin' on babies
No, no, no, no

My babysitter, she's a pretty cool lady
Type of girl, like to get crazy
Nah, she ain't sittin' on babies
No, no, no, no

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