Truth Is

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Truth is i don't know if I can do this
Truth is I might be through with music
Truth is I think I'm bout to lose it
Truth is my thoughts have got me ruined
Truth is i don't know if I can do this
Truth is I might be through with music
Truth is I think I'm bout to lose it
Truth is my thoughts have got me ruined

As I sit here with this paper trying to scribble new rhymes
In a world full of color all I see is blue lines
Everything I used to love has gotten so monotonous
My mental state and depressions gotten so synonymous
I almost thought all this self-loathing was anonymous
Yet it was my brain saying everything seems so ominous
How could my self consciousness be so dominant
Make me sick until the point I can't stop vomiting
Trying to fill a void inside me so bottomless
Staring at my place they have saved in the necropolis
Trying to escape the constant feeling of this hollowness
Maybe the way for me to fix it's hollow tips
Might be thinking it but there's no way that I could follow it
Only way I escape it is a loss of consciousness
I'd be lying if I said thoughts only crossed a few times
Even when I smile remember every dime has two sides

Truth is i don't know if I can do this
Truth is I might be through with music
Truth is I think I'm bout to lose it
Truth is my thoughts have got me ruined
Truth is i don't know if I can do this
Truth is I might be through with music
Truth is I think I'm bout to lose it
Truth is my thoughts have got me ruined

Look I'm not sure if I can do this any longer
Not sure I could weather the storm and come out any stronger
I'm only still here cuz I'm thinking of my mama
If she weren't around homie I would prolly be a goner
I would be addicted to pills, booze and marijuana
I would bury myself alive and fertilize the fauna
Every day approaching hell I'm closer to the sauna
Kept awake at night by this life inflicted trauma
And I ain't saying this just to heighten up the drama
But this saga won't stop til I reach Nirvana
And I can bring honor to the name of my papa
Dreaming of the gold but only see the copper
Only way I see out is the end of a choppa
Depressions overloaded brain's drain got a stoppa
Feel myself going bonkers turning to a monster
This is just another obstacle that I have to conquer

Truth is i don't know if I can do this
Truth is I might be through with music
Truth is I think I'm bout to lose it
Truth is my thoughts have got me ruined
Truth is i don't know if I can do this
Truth is I might be through with music
Truth is I think I'm bout to lose it
Truth is my thoughts have got me ruined

Sometimes it's hard to get up in the booth an spit the truth
To admit that I'm depressed and be able to say to you
That sometimes I cry, sometimes I weep
Sometimes I can only sleep bout eight hours a week
I hate waking up, I just wanna slumber in peace
Looking for a flash of lightning but only thunder increased
By different degrees while I'm out here sniffing the breeze
I'm about to freeze so I'm lighting spliffs of this tree
To get my mind elevated to make it free
The ones that have everything try to take it from me
On the verge of quitting I must've forsaken my dream
But I was wrong I may have made a mistake it may seem
That I'm too wishy washy to ever stay on the scene
So I'll stop playing with you and start playing with beats
While whipping through your city in a Sedan or a Coupe
I demanded the truth I ain't quitting I'm still a man in his youth

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