Drugs

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Son Manic

4:49

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Hey mom we havent talked in a while
I guess that I forgot to hit you back with a smile
I did my best surpressed my feelings kept them tucked like a file
But I've been waiting for too long I think it's time to reply
I remember back when I was a child
We never had too much but always stayed in the lines
I knew that you were different separate that from mind
And we gon fight this world together take one step at a time
But things changed quick and now i couldn't adapt
Your home is supposed to feel safe with you I felt trapped
Couldn't fathom normal life the kids at school had
Eating dinner at a home with both a mom and a dad
I promise it's okay you know you shouldn't feel sad
15 years later and no longer I'm mad
It took a while to just accept that our life would be bad
All you had to do was fucking toss those drugs in the bag.
But I hope for your sake you find the life you once had
You wont get in the gates not to visit your dad
What did you think would happen got this game in the bag
Tucked back in that drawer pills wrapped in a rag
Its like you never even realized the things that you had
You got some clout and some money still you puffin a drag
I see your bloodshot eyes your mind sporadic and wack
Now you're locked up in your room give it a day and you'll be back
Pathetic as a parent and an even worse mom
I wish that I could go back and set off a bomb
To let you know your 4 kids are hurting inside
They just want a fuckin mother not a fiend with a pipe
I wish I couldnt remember I was already 9
You deserved every second that they made you do time
I'm beyond fine now I've got a house and a life
I dont ever wanna see you so dont show up this time nah
Why so you pretend you care pretend that you love me
not bout to buy that shit look at the way that you treated me
I've never been the first choice never did you believe in me
the f*ck am I to do now was it dark that you could see in me
So Look at my success and take your time to sit and grieve
The worst human being breathing air of the scene
Why dont you put the needle down and get yourself clean
Listen to your family you can hear the melody.
Writing on this verse its gonna hurt me the most
I've spent so many years worried that you'd be ghost
Find your body in a ditch somewhere up in the coasts
Doctor ruled the Cause of death a good overdose
Maggots eating at your body chicken and roast
Its fucked up I know but were you even comatose
I wish that youd go back to bars and given the toast
Because a life of worry isnt fun its not worth the boast
It's either jailtime or death and I've been weighing them both
Figure this shit out because I'm leaving my post
perfect picture of a sinner but overcome most
And I've been tried and ive been challenged now it's you that I toast
I wanna thank you for showing mediocre at most
Without you my life ended quick like riposte
But it's not because of something that you ever did close
No it's because you never did put your kids in foremost
Now were growing older bit of weight on our post
So f*ck you for thinking it's okay to go ghost
You've got a whole fuckin army with you love to promote
We've got hearts in our chests and now were giving you notes
I cant spend another second knowing I'm in your quotes
I would lay awake at night and pray youd given up dope
And you tell me my life is what now matters the most
My success and happiness is what your mouth brings to boast ugh

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