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The Fourth Horse

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I don't know you
You never do what I expect
Feel tense and at ease when I'm next to you
Every day I'm tryna keep the devil off my back
But every day there's another devil on its way
Sometimes I feel like there's no escape
What else can I do? 
But light one up?

Yeah right, you think that I would show my face tonight?
After everything I've done today to keep the pressure light
'Cause every time I take a bite somebody's gotta bite back
I'm just tryna keep myself alone and on the right track
Finally make a habit pushing myself on the bike path
Grinding through the day until the darkness brings the light back

Yeah, I'm gonna reach my goals
But I'm gonna take a while
I've been coasting a long time
Thankfully there's no such thing as waste
Just gotta take some space
The last thing we learn in life is who we are
And to someone I'm a star

Take it, take it, take it right back
To the point when you knew
What it meant to be you 
In this world without truth
Take it right back
To the moment in your youth
When you first stepped in the booth
And found it was so soothing

I blame myself for the sleep I've been losing
I tame my thoughts with the smoking and boozing
Got a knot in my stomach though I'm cruising
There's a lot of loneliness in this illusion
I've always thought that my presence was an intrusion
And now I'm caught tryna pay my penance of seclusion
Stranded in a cycle of depression and delusion
Admitting that I've got a couple blessings I'm abusing

Days like these ain't no time to pick and choose
And I'm trying to see through but can't believe how deep this ruse is
I'm on a quest to venture deep inside my mind
Only answer that I find is that I'm just a confused kid

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