Cry for Help

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Among Loneliness

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I'm broken
But the damage can't be undone
There's no reparation for what I've become
I'm losing my mind and then some
I'm thinking I might succumb 
To the thoughts, fears, and doubts
My mind is in a happiness drought
I wish I could just shout
Out to my loved ones 
What pain I'm feeling
But I can't break that ceiling
I feel like that'd be stealing
The joy from the life they give
The life I live
I just want to take this pain 
Shove it away 
But I sit in my room and I cry all day
I don't believe in anything to pray
So I write this on a page
To say all the things I 
Can't vocally say
Because I 've built this barricade
Maybe it's 'cause i'm embarrassed okay?
"You have no reason to be sad"
"Your life's not that bad"
"You should be glad"
My brain rings constantly with these words
There's no reason to hurt
But my mind is damn sure
That i don't possess an ounce of worth
There's not a single place on this earth
For me or my problems
There's no one to help me solve 'em
Let alone a single one of them!
So I walk this path alone
While I'm at home
I waste away on my phone
To distract me from myself
Because this is my hell
And if you can't tell 
This is my cry for help.  

The world seems dark
Where's the light I was told
Was at the end of the tunnel
How am I supposed to cope?
I'm at the end of my rope

I shove my feelings inside
Because I wanna hide
This life is a lie
I want off of this ride
All my life I've shied  
Away from the fact
That I don't know if my feelings are real or justified. 
Because when the tears are dried
And the emptiness subsides
I'm more or less the same
And then I can't complain
I feel like I'm going insane
Can someone please explain
Even if it's in vain
Of why i'm feeling this way
I know this is a lot
But it's constantly in my thoughts 
Drowning me out, i really ought
To stop here but the words keep flowing
I don't see any slowing from here
I don't know who else to tell
This is my hell, and I wish you well
Please excuse my cry for help.

The world seems dark
Where's the light I was told
Was at the end of the tunnel
How am I supposed to cope?
I'm at the end of my rope

And I think I've lost all hope 
I'm not trying to evoke
A response from anyone
I just want to put out what I've been holding back
For so long
I can finally break free 
And let you see the way I breathe 
I hope you don't judge me for my honesty 
But it's how I feel lately 
I just need a way to cope 

The world seems dark
Where's the light I was told
Was at the end of the tunnel
How am I supposed to cope?
I'm at the end of my rope

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