Deep Thoughts

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Young EGO

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It’s already done there’s no way to reverse it
Been living in sin and not one of us perfect
Numbing the pain cause I’ve been feeling so worthless
I just need somebody to really show me I’m worth it Lately been contemplating like my life got no purpose
So I bottle my emotions never watching them surface
All these suicidal thoughts steady making me nervous
I’m just speaking from the heart when I’m writing these verses
You gone end up in hearses if you messing with the team
I’ve been taking all these drugs cause I don’t wanna feel a thing
Numbing all this pain cause it never really leaves
Drowning in my sorrows just makes it hard to breathe
And lately I haven’t been feeling too affectionate
Never had the guidance so lately been feeling lost again
No father figure to notice all my accomplishments
No one to have my back or try to boost up my confidence
But it’s alright cause I know I’m gone be okay
Staying up every night just praying for better days
Taking it day by day just hoping that things would change
But it just stays the same
And all I’m feeling is pain
I’m so stuck in my ways
Always taking the blame
Throw the 9 to my brain
Take my problems away
No I am not okay
Been thinking about you constantly
Feeling like a dream
And all of it feels unreal to me
Taken way too soon
I’m hoping my grandma’s proud of me
Mama raised a man
So none of it really gets to me
Dealing with depression
And trying to cope with anxiety
Built for all this pain
And all the sorrows inside of me
I feel the distance
Lately been really tripping
Mind has been on a mission
The devils been steady tempting
Might as well go and end it
Girl why you acting so different
You claim to love me then switch it
I’m tired of how you flipping
Got me so contradicted
Been known to have good intentions
Tired of constant fussing
And all the heated discussions
Seemed to be going solid
Supposed to be making progress
You took my trust and you broke it
I'm left with a clouded conscience
Took my heart and you lost it
Done with all your assumptions
Now I’m just overthinking
Slowly drowning I’m sinking
Numbing the pain by drinking
My Novocaine and my weakness
You left me without a reason
Alone with all of my demons
All of these nights are sleepless
Stuck on you and I’m tweaking
On the low you was scheming
You lied to me then you cheated
Should’ve never believed it
Wishing I could’ve seen it
Now I’m stuck with my demons
My Novocaine and my weakness

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