Shower

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Natasha Fairbairn

3:49

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Have you ever just taken 
A knife
Put it right in the heart 
Of your life
Felt it twisting with 
Every wrong turn
Blood under all of the 
Bridges to burn

I got onto that flight 
Needed freeing 
Been through more than enough
Needed healing
You and I 
We would talk on and off
You'd lead me on
Only just enough

I believed in the lies 
That you sold me
Caught up in all the webs 
Of your stories
You exploited the wounded parts 
Of me
And now 
I 
See

How I'd paint every one 
Of your flags white
How I'd put myself up 
To fight your fight
Had your back
But I fought 
On the wrong side
And now I

I don't wanna talk about it
I don't wanna talk about it
It's there in my dreams
And it's haunting me
I don't wanna talk about it
I don't wanna talk about it
I just wanna take a long shower
I just want to think about nothing

No I can't even put into words
The depth of the way 
That it hurts
To live with my part 
In your gain
A King to power
A tyrannous reign

Well you got what you wanted
Disposed of me
Thought it couldn't get worse 
Then this ending
Till I went out alone at night
I met a man 
I spent the night

But I paid the ultimate price
I said no so many times
But I cried alone to myself
Who was I to now cry for help?

Complicated layers of shame
In that moment
Everything changed
Knew I'd stood by a man
Who had done the same
Just a different name

I don't wanna talk about it
I don't wanna talk about it
But he's in my dreams
And he's haunting me
They're telling me 
I should talk about it
But I don't really wanna 
Talk about it
Get your hands off me
Get your hands off me

Can you tell me what he looks like?
Can you tell me his name?
Can you tell me what time?
Can you tell me what day?
Can you tell me what he looks like?
Can you tell me his name?
Can you tell me what time?
Can you tell me what day?
Can you tell me what he looks like?
Can you tell me his name?
Can you tell me what time?
Can you tell me what day?

Maybe I should talk about it
They're telling me 
I should talk about it
I just wanna take a long shower
I just wanna think about nothing
But I'm gonna talk about it
Be brave and talk about it
How many showers does it take?
How many showers does it take?

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