Illumination

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Bill Waves

3:43

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I️ truly thought I'd never make it to today 
I️ truly thought I️ was a waste of this  space 
I️ truly thought I'd never taste another good taste 
The bitter in my mouth from the taste of drugs
Look around it's winter with the cloudson my face is blood 
Look down 

All I️t was was
Take drugs look down
Take drugs look down

Until she wants to
Make love look out 

But look Now we're just fucking out of the madness 
Coming through the ground I've been punching out of my casket 

Back against the bed I️ can't stop pacing
My friends I've been two faced with faded from meds that I can't stop taking 

My minds racing through days that I️ thought I️d never make it 

I try and think of which way a sign is  
But then I'm sinking 

You found me dying too proud Im trying to hide it 
You found it 
I tried to lie 
The truths out and now I'll be quiet 
The silence hurts 
When it's merged with a riot of violent nerves 
And it's hopeless to try live with this being alone broken
I'm so blessed so blessed 
But so sick 
I'm so stressed so stressed 
That it won't give 

And all those days I thought about you  
Let me tell you bout em 

So you can walk around acting like 
You never felt like that about me 

And all those days I thought about you  
Let me tell you bout em 

So you can walk around acting like 
You never felt like that about me 

See that was 3 years ago and I still feel it 
All my exes every time I get that feeling I'm sick and  
I got a list at home of shit I did I wish I didn't 
I got a lot of empty promises and missing pictures 
But now it's different 
I just want a good living til I have some good pictures to take 
Shit 
I just had a good Christmas for a change 
Im here to make it for all the years I was taking
All the wrongs from the day I was born
Moms tears made it storm 
All the fear  I prayed off 
All the tears in my songs 

I've been gone it's been to long 
I've been wrong it's been too wrong 
Walking through my city don't really know I belong
They're talking shit but don't really know me at all 

And all those days I thought about you  
Let me tell you bout em 

So you can walk around acting like 
You never felt like that about me 

And all those days I thought about you  
Let me tell you bout em 

So you can walk around acting like 
You never felt like that about me 

Ever since I came from a place I can't find ways to explain 
Its my brain on the days that rain 
It's my pain on the page 
I made it this far 
But can I stay here for long?
Can I keep it?
Evils deceiving see it leaving needles on my street I mean yes I'm a genius 
Pick it and I'll eat it I mean it 
But I'm stressing 
I might pick myself to pieces to feed them if I don't get this 
I'm fiending
You'll see the numbers I left with 
My destinys to see it so 
Please you don't wana test it 
I'm dreaming

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