Dear Dad

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D. Monell Edwards

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I'm embarrassed now I feel nothing

Hey Deddy, three decades silent, a deafening space
Spilling my thoughts on this page, hoping you'll embrace
Remember when I idolized you, my childhood hero
But that image shattered, the day you almost became the zero

So many nights, I questioned my worth, a hollow ache (ooooo)
Yearning for a father's love, a connection I couldn't make (ooooo)
But your silence echoed, a chasm deep and wide (ooooo)
Leaving a son wounded, with nowhere to hide. (ooooo)

You broke my heart, left your own flesh and blood (ooooo)
Aching for a father's love, lost in the flood(ooooo)
I needed you then, and I still need you now (ooooo)
The scars of abandonment, I can't disavow. (ooooo)

So many questions, swirling in my mind
A son's yearning for a father's time
But the silence was deafening, the absence deep
Leaving a void, a wound I couldn't keep.

Years turned to miles, the distance grew cold
Your promises faded, stories left untold
No heart-to-hearts, no guidance to find
Just an empty echo, left far behind

You broke my heart, left your own flesh and blood (oooooh)
Aching for a father's love, lost in the flood(oooooh)
I needed you then, and I still need you now (oooooh)
The scars of abandonment, I can't disavow. (oooooh)

Years turned to miles, the distance grew cold
Your promises faded, stories left untold
No heart-to-hearts, no guidance to find
Just an empty echo, left far behind

Mom's memory a flicker, a flame that still burns
But you moved on so quickly, another lesson learned
New wife, new life, a family rebuilt
But we, your children, left out in the cold, unfulfilled.

I watched you choose her, time and time again
Our pain dismissed, as if it were pretend
We became strangers, living separate lives (oooooh)
Now I'm a man, with scars that run deep
The anger subsides, a forgiveness I seek
Time is precious, and I won't let it slip away
I need to rebuild this bridge, before it's too late to say.

Haunted by the past, by a love I never knew (dear dad)
A father's embrace, a promise untrue (dear dad)
The weight of your absence, a burden I bear (dear dad)
But in this brokenness, a flicker of hope I dare. (dear dad)

So many nights, I questioned my worth, a hollow ache
Yearning for a father's love, a connection I couldn't make
But your silence echoed, a chasm deep and wide
Leaving a son wounded, with nowhere to hide.

I pour out my heart, in every word I write (oooo)
Hoping for a connection, to set things right (oooo)
Forget the past, the apologies, the blame (oooo)
Just give me a chance, to know you by name. (oooo)

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