Eulogy

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Oubrey Ray

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That breeze is makin' me sway, makin' me feel so high
That breeze is makin' me sway, makin' me feel so high
That breeze is makin' me sway, makin' me feel so high
That breeze is makin' me sway, makin' me feel so high
I'm not sure how I should begin telling you this story but ever since she was ten, she realized she was made for them
So she took a bit of time to reevaluate thought maybe if she'd never speak, they'd never have to look her way again
One time she went to her mom's and peeked behind the corner wish she'd never seen it, cause now she would never look at her the same
So she grew up thinkin' this was true love, never knew love always tucked away because she won't even remember this
And she knows that it's not right, but she feels it in her bones that no matter what she'd do, they'd rather look out for you and themselves
And their partner who no doubt just made them question if they even have a mouth and
She knew something was up right as soon as her mom walked in with a beat up face, said everything will be okay, let's give this all one more day
Maybe he'll calm down once we give him some space
So the next day she went back to her dad's innocently scrolling on his phone in hopes of finding something to pretend
Instead she found pictures of his lustful appetite caught in between the love for him and all this pitiful resentment
She knew once she told him, everyone would turn on her so she considered death, maybe that would be more blissful
When she told her mom and dad, her dad made her move out
Hit him once, hit him twice, then she's coming for my neck
Screaming, damn how could you do me like this
She was hanging on by a thread, how could you guys not see it
You were too caught up in your bullshit, making her pay for it
She was helplessly hoping you wouldn't leave with nothing left
Don't I know how it feels to be nine and have nothing left
Cause of you, I'm not who I'd like to be
Cause of you, I'm not who I'd like to be
Cause of you, I'm not who I'd like to be
Cause of you, I'm not who I'd like to be
It's not how I want it to be
But I would rather be with you than be back on my feet
Maybe you can take my mind
Cause I would rather be with you than be back on my feet
Something that I'm feeling, got me thinking like I'm nothing
When I take a step back, to really think of all those things
And I ask myself, why would I do this
And it's like, hey, why should I be here another day
When all I do is sit around, wish around
Thinking I can break this nasty habit
And I wish I could tell me how my life's supposed to go
Cause I would trust that more than if I made it my own show
Cause every word I say has no meaning unless you tell me so
I don't wanna thank you, I don't wanna use you
I don't even really wanna find any virtue
I don't even really wanna find someone to pursue
I just wanna find some closure in your mind
So I don't have to continue wasting the night
I'm not really ready to find you
I'm not who I say I am

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