Mama, I’m Sorry

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Lesia Karpenko

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My Mom used to tell me
Let it be your biggest worry
When I fell, hurt my leg, lost a doll,
Faced heartbreak.
She would hold me and say
I wish it to be the worst thing on your way

Mama, I'm sorry,
For collecting so many worries
You were right
Life will keep on hitting you harder
You will face irreversible truth,
Wishing it was
Only a bruise
On your knee
Not a friend that you lose,
Not a love to give up,
Not a heart of your closest to stop

Mom, you did well
As of now, even in hell,
I'd remember, this is not the biggest challenge to face
So I keep on running my race
Maybe I'm still alive just because I am hungry to know
The full potential of troubles to grow
And to check, on each step that I take,
Is it the one
That will break
Me?

As your prophecy said,
Mom, it wasn't that bad
Not the worst of the pains yet
I rise from the floor as I know
One day even you wouldn't come to the door
Would we add that one to the list?
Would you dare insist?
That it wouldn't be
Toughest to live,
That it wouldn't be
My biggest grief?

I'm not blaming you, Mom,
For gifting me time
With your saying.
I'm staying
As a curious soul
Who once lost dear doll
Thinking
That was the end
Of her world
Maybe it was

As the sorrow appears,
You are wiping my tears
In my head
I sit on your lap
Knowing
It's not the last of my stories
As it is not yet
My biggest worry

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