Disappointment

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MJ Smuv

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If you've ever been told you weren't good enough
You've probably thought to yourself that you had done something wrong
Thinking what if you could change and fix your ways
Would it all turn out okay and not so bad
No, it ain't easy, you know that already
You're a broken soul, trying to find your home
You make mistakes, and then feel ashamed
See yourself in the mirror, think it's better if you'd disappear
You hear the voice in your head saying
I'm a disappointment
To my family and friends
I know they're disappointed
I just wish they'd understand
I, too, am a person, I ain't perfect
Even though I know God gave me a purpose
It's so hard to feel success
When all you feel is like a disappointment
It's frustrating, aggravating being on your own
Thinking nobody's here to help you when you feel alone
Trying to grow inside this home, a lot of shoes to fill
Depression kicking in it's hard to find the will to live
And all you want to do is close your eyes and hope it's just a dream
Instead you wake up, come to terms that it's reality
It makes you cry though your pride keeps your tears inside
You'll hide the truth to those who care, saying you're alright
You wanna meet the expectations
Of your loved ones, show them what you're made of
But it's so hard cause you're constantly judged
'fraid you'll mess up, beat yourself up saying
I'm a disappointment
To my family and friends
I know they're disappointed
I just wish they'd understand
I too am a person, I ain't perfect
Even though I know God gave me a purpose
It's so hard to feel success
When all you feel is like a disappointment
Years have passed, everyone's gone
It's your turn, but you hold on
Laying in bed, chords on your chest
Praying for relief, taking your final breath
Remembering everything you did
Hoping that's enough that God will forgive
Asking Him, am I worth it
Or am I still only
Just a disappointment
To all my family and friends
I know you're disappointed
I just wish you'd understand
That I too am a person, I ain't perfect
Even though I know God gave me a purpose
Will I ever feel success
Or will I always be a disappointment

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