fear and loathing in new jersey (pt 1​-​4)

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ashley palmer

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Can anyone hear me
I ventured too far from home this time
Can anyone see me
I ventured too far in limbo this time

The burnrest is my friend
She isn't very well read
But she means something to me
The burnrest is my friend (The burnrest is my friend)
She isn't very well read
But she means something to me (Something to me)
She hands me her life
It's in the palm of my hands
You can go ahead and try
Though it may be a bit dry
She showed me right from wrong and wrong from right
She gets the two mixed up
But that's ok
That's ok

I'm turning into my worse nightmare (But that's ok)
I'm losing everyone who cares (But that's ok)
I'm burning all my bridges (But that's ok)
I'm unthreading all my stitches (But that's ok)

That's ok
That's ok
That's ok (That's ok)
That's ok (That's ok)

But that's ok

Please leave the room
I'll disappear in a few hours
I don't want you to be there to witness it
I know you won't be able to cope with it

That's what she said to me on new years eve
As I walked into her room to see
Pill bottles scattered across the floor
Dosages slowly growing more and more
"How much time do you have left"
She said she isn't sure
Then she said she loved me
All the way from her hearts core

It's the last years
It's the last years
Last years
Last years

God is a woman
And I want to die in its arms
Face in its bosom
And legs wrapped around her hips
In the endless ocean
But this time I'll float, I'm sure
And if I don't
Please hold me
No matter how tired your arms get
I'll make it up to you someday

My flowers are shriveled
I left them for too long
I hoped the rain would do the job for me
But it never came to me

No more colours are left in their petals
No more colours are left in their souls
Left in their souls

My room, is falling apart
Wallpaper peeling from old paper arts
My fears are realized
And they're being lobotomized

Ashes to ashes
I always fall down
In the ashtray I befriended so long ago
So long ago

I miss the scent of you
Your hoodie brings back memories of old
Of good times, of bad times
I was so lucky to have you

No more colours are left in your eyes
No more colours are left in my soul
Left in my soul

Our flowers are shriveled
We left them for too long
I hoped we could meet again
So we could take care of them again
I know your work wasn't trivial
And I'm sorry for all the times you sneezed
and I never said bless you

I think I cursed you for eternity
Because of what I said
Or lack thereof
Lack thereof

I wish I was back in your womb
When I came out the world was scary and new
I don't think I ever adjusted
And I never will

I felt so many things about you
So much that now I don't know what feelings are
Feelings are

You said you'd always be there
But that was just a lie
A lie that I could not get by

You came and went
The only one I ever had
And I still don't fucking blame you
But I still don't know how to talk about you

I punch my mattress
In a desperate rage
The flowers die today
Die today
Oh the flowers die today

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