DYIN

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t9xic

4:05

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(Verse - Spendit)
Yeah, I gotta keep my focus
Yeah, I'm tryna stay down, don't be hopeless
Now they telling me I'm chosen
Way too high, I'm outta my body, but you know I'm still in the moment
Keep poppin pills, sippin potions
No, I can't stop taking the OxyContin
She expect more out of me so her legs start locking
 I already tell everybody that I stopped poppin
I used to love her so much till she got so rotten
And, now she telling me try again
So high, I'm looking through rose gold lens
I miss everybody, I miss all my friends
I never believed there would be an end
But everything ends, you can't be a winner
Can't stop my addictions, eating roxi for dinner
Can't believe in no God, I'm my own creator
And I don't give a f*ck if they call me a sinner
Give her reassurance that I don't hate her
Tell her hate the game, don't hate the player
Said "this shit a game? I ain't having no fun"
Take three more pills, got me numb
I question myself, I look up to the sun
Ruined all my relationships, what have I done
At least I got my Momma, sometimes we fight
But deep down know I love to be her son
She tell me she'll try and help me through my problems
I tell her "I'm good, don't worry, I got it"
She tell me "stop lying, just quit the denying" 
Then she start crying, she don't want to see her son dyin
I have a hard time sleeping, I need me the Xans
Born into a home with addiction, really ruined my plans
But, you know, I can't complain cause I'm still living
And I'm still out here, not in the can
I'm not sitting out in the rain
Way back there, you see, all better days
Tell me "I fucked up," I don't know what to say
Wherever we go, she knows I'll pay
Yeah, I'm really hoping she don't just love me for the money
Cause if I got her around, all the days still sunny
Lil boy stop all that laughing cause ain't shit funny
Cause you know I'm a good guy but sometimes I get scummy
And I still ride around wit the glock
All these days go fast, move 'round the clock
Better run fast too if you don't want to be shot
Told my Grandma "I'll meet you right there at the top"

(Bridge - Spendit & t9xic) 
All these drugs be helping my soul, it all started spiralling out of control
Then you left me alone, I ain't know where to go
So I had to stop thinking and move with the flow
Keep getting fucked up, to keep passing time
I'm crushin up Oxy, I'm making a line
I just need someone to give me a sign
So I stop being worried and know it's all fine
I know it's all fine, uh
Keep telling myself that it's fine Deep down inside, know that I'm dyin
Know that I'm
Yeah, Know I'm 'gon keep flyin
Pourin up another line
I can't stop myself from hidin
All these problems from my past been fucking up my mind
I'm still tryin
But I'm still tryin
I'm still

(Verse - t9xic)
Yeah, I'm still dropping a perc in my system every morning when I wake up
I can't lie, I been abusing them opiates since our first breakup
I remember seeing the tears in your eyes, fucking up your makeup
I remember the way you would look in my eyes and lie
Since then I been showing fake love
Been geeked of the motherfucking drugs
Been repeat calling the plug
I keep looking up to above
Think real soon they'll release the doves
If I just keep kissing the cup
If I die high, then I died in love
Don't wanna die with no slut
So I just keep pouring it up
Codeine numb the memories
Hate thinking back, replaying what you said to me
Off drugs, I'm a better me
Sober get caught up in my thoughts, tormenting me
Two oxy, say "it's for my knee"
But I'm really just high so you feel dead to me
Thrilling me with your ecstasy
Taking me on a jet to be
Right by your side, drinking Hennessy
On the beachfront, toes in the sand, and the sea
Instead you're not even next to me
Look to my side, see my favourite recipe
Promethazine and codeine, heavenly
In love, it's my favourite remedy
Quickly becoming my, identity
I just hope that it don't get the best of me
Know that I'm fine
Know that I'm dyin

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