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Alterak

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Yo, this happens every time
Why the f*ck I'm in a survival mode all the time?
And everyone around me is fine
And I don't know why I haven't killed myself yet
Some kind of ego keeps me alive
And the time I sleep someone is rhyming inside of me
And putting together words that'll hurt
But it's fun to feel all of this
Cause something inside changes and I stop feeling anything for anyone
And it makes me feel like I can do anything
Anything is acceptable, goals perceptible
I don't like what I'm becoming but I'm on the cloud nine
Somebody better kill me before I kill anyone
Without even a gun quicker than the Columbine
I don't know why I don't wanna stop
Pop my brain off, or pop your brain off
Nothing else feel the same, yo
I'm feeling like being an a-hole
I don't know why I'm liking what I'm saying though
I've never been this way before
Some kind of a piece missing
I'm puzzled, my head spinning
Someone better get me in a stretcher with hands tied
I don't wanna hurt anyone
But this fucking head of mine is acting kinda shitty
And I don't understand why
Is someone living inside of me? Some fucking spirit?
Cause I wanna say things to people that'll make them hate me in a minute
Whatever it was that made me who I was is now diminished
Shut the f*ck up you fucking bitch

I don't know why everything's fucked up in my head
I tried to do best but nothing's been working for me
I think it's best if I cut myself free
But something saves me and makes me feel like I can do anything
Numb down my feeling
I think it fills me with some pride
I guess the ego's what keeps me alive

Get up, rise and shine
Fed up from this shit? Then man up
You piece of shit, you cannot do anything useful
You're a f*ck up
You can't even be a f*ck up properly
A garbage bin is better than your fucking ass
I'm laughing my ass off to see you struggling to survive
Even though you were so bright
Every night you cry and I won't lie
It makes me hard to see a bitch about your fucking life
Wishing you could fucking die
This is what you fucking like, this is what gives you the purpose
Make yourself a piece of shit
So they can talk about all the fucking time you're brought up in
Your ego is the best thing you can fall back to
When things get worse you crawl back to your fucking self
The real version, the version they don't see
Insecure, practically living in his own manure
Could give the creeps to Bjork again
You take the gun and blow your brain
When things don't work your fucking way
Oh shit you're gonna fucking cry? I don't fucking care
I'm all you fucking got to help you to do better
What the f*ck do you think, helping a bitch will get you in it?
This fucking lifestyle you try to reach is out of your reach
If you don't be selfish and do whatever it takes
Things escalate so fast
Heart beats in a faster rate
Everything is just dark and grey
Everyone is just up against you
Anything can be used against you
What the f*ck do you think I would do?
Hide in the room and then fucking pray?
Hoping things would de-escalate?
F*ck no!

I don't know why everything's fucked up in my head
I tried to do best but nothing's been working for me
I think it's best if I cut myself free
But something saves me and makes me feel like I can do anything
Numb down my feeling
I think it fills me with some pride
I guess the ego's what keeps me alive

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