How Could You

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I'm all alone in this ocean full of people
I only hear your tone when the words feel so deceitful
Addicted to my phone cause I'm vain and it's the needle
Fell from grace and broke my funny bone, now laughing's feeling evil
I don't wanna break your heart but life is getting ugly
What hurts the most is knowing I have to lose you just to love me
And trusting my intentions with no intention to trust me
I pulled the knife but you only saw that it cut deep
How come I feel the guilt when I ain't even make the wounds
I'll carve your name into the hollow walls within this empty tomb
I'll spend my life chasing a feeling that can smell like your perfume
I only show myself at night, I guess I understand the moon
You watched as my best friend died in my arms
But you weren't there for me to bandage up my damage and scars
Maybe you were, but I never felt it
Or maybe I'm just broken and can't help being helpless
Like you wanted to start over but you never had the courage
So baby here's your chance, you were a flower going flourish
I wish this shit was easier, wish I felt more encouraged
Wish I could let go of this feeling and not hide it from the surface
And I'm not perfect, I won't ever even consider it
My thoughts alone can only prove I'm fluent in this gibberish
Maybe I've been destined for some things that I can't fathom
Maybe Eve just spit the apple and I'm punished just like Adam
F*ck it, love you enough to let you find something better
If you think that you deserve it, I won't stop you and that's ever
When I found you, I uncovered you and treated you like treasure
You loved me and you kept me like a promise
Like them letters that I wrote you
And I knew you
But I ain't even know you
I ain't even know you
How could you just watch as I drifted away
How could you just watch as I sit with a pain
How could you possibly not see it and not find an escape
How could you let me go and never even beg me to stay
How could you shatter everything that I thought that you were
How could I matter when I never got the thoughts I deserved
How could you take my heart for granted when I knew I was sure
How could you
No, no, no

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