Venting Out Loud

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HitEmUpTy

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Hello
How you doing?
I'm doing good
How you doing?
I'm doing okay
I was just thinking about you
I wanted to call you, What you doing right now?
What I'm doing right now, Sitting watching TV
So you feeling better and everything?, You okay
Well, I think so
I'm just, you know, I'm still trying
I'm going to Dialysis every day, every week
You know just trying to hang on in there
Oh, okay
That was all I wanted though
I just wanted to make sure I talked to you
Oh, Teedie that make me feel so good
Ima make sure I come and see you one of these days
Okay well I'll talk to you another day okay
Okay I love you, (I love you Teedie bye bye)
Bye
Uh, Uh, Uh, Uhhh
You know what I'm saying
I don't really
I don't really like to talk about, like, family, personal stuff
You know what I'm saying
But sometimes it be on my mind heavy
You know what I'm saying
Finna talk about my feelings on it, but no, this ain't no love song
Growing up without my daddy, man, I swear it make me love wrong
Woman that raised me up from birth dead my love gone
I'm just trying to learn how to live and go love on
I talked to my grandma, man, I love it when I see her smile
Really hurt my soul when she said I was her worst child
Took me on vacation, I ain't like it, I was acting up
Badass kid, just like Mike, Mike, I was bad as f*ck
Huh, I wasn't raised around my brother, no
We got different daddies, but you know that's still my brother though
If it come down to it, Got his back like no one other oh
Might not be the closest, hope you know that I still love you, though
I know it's some distance, hope my family don't resent me
Helena fucked me up when she asked why I'm not like Kennedi
Some shit that I think about whenever I drink Hennessy
Ion think you can compare me and Kennedi
We got two different identities
I mean, I don't think you can compare us for real
You know, her mom was in her life
I mean, my mom was in my life too, but not as much as I like
And I don't blame her for it
She had kids and they was basically grown
Maybe I'd be more like Terri and Mike if I grew up in that home
And now my life a lil different
I got a father-in-law
Do more for me than my father, so my father Mark Shaw
And Helena in my head got me sitting in awe
I might not be nothing like my cousin, but that don't mean it's a flaw
I mean, my life like a movie
Sometimes it's a tough situation
I still think about it to this day, man I missed Terri graduation
Like I was talking to her one day
We was having us a conversation
She asked since I didn't grow up with her and Mike
Did I feel any separation?
And I'm like, no, I don't resent you
I'm not mad
But I do think about life with you
What kinda life I woulda had
Happy that you in my life, though
Make me glad
Sometimes I wish I could've seen you and Mike Mike dad
And they ask why I talk to my momma still, but don't talk to my daddy
They be like, she wasn't there either
I don't even see why you be happy
And I'm like, as far as I see it, my momma, she tried to make it
I ain't see my father facing no parties or graduations
So honestly, I can say this
I guess that's the reason I'm happy
And I see her a lot more now
That's why I love Miss Lackey
I'm not even trying to rhyme no more
These the feelings I'm shedding
Honestly, I'm glad I got to hold the ring at my grandmother wedding
And I know sometimes I'm distant
But I want y'all to know that I love y'all
I ain't really grow up in a loving household
So sometimes my love small
Like, I ain't really grow up on that
So I'm not the type to pick up the phone and make a call
I just want y'all to know I really mean it whenever I say I love y'all

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