Hey, are you from Tinder?

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reAnia

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So I was just on Tinder
And I was swiping left, swiping left, swiping left
And then I came across this guy
Who was quite good looking
But he had really shit pictures

So I was going through his pictures thinking
Should I swipe left? Should I swipe right?
Like I wasn't sure
But then I thought, I have nothing to lose
So I swiped right
And it said
It's a match

Then he messaged me
We chatted for a bit
But then I stopped speaking to him
Because I met somebody else
But he kept sending me these messages
Like: I know people think you are outgoing
But deep down you are really shy
And lame stuff like that

I never replied to it
And later I unmatched him
Because I just thought he was weird

A few weeks later I was just going to the gym
And I see this guy in convertible BMW
Listening to really loud music
Such a type
I carried on walking
Few minutes later I hear
Hey, are you from Tinder?

And it's this guy in the car
And I thought: this is so embarrassing
And I was like: yeah
And he was like: you're into art, aren't you?
And I was like: yeah

And I'm trying to think
Who is this guy?
And he was like: don't you remember me?
And I was like: yeah I remember you
And then he said: I'll message you
And I said: ok

And then I remembered
It's this guy from Tinder who I unmatched
So I thought, ok he is not gonna message me, good

Then a few weeks later I was just coming back from the gym
And I see this guy across the street
And I'm thinking
He will probably talk to me
He's such a type
And he said: hey, you're from Tinder, right?

He said: don't you remember me?
And I realised it's this guy from the car
And I thought, this is so weird!
And he said: the universe wanted us to meet

And he wouldn't let me go
So I had to give him my phone number
But I thought: ok
I'm gonna be open
I'm gonna be open for love
So I agreed to go out with him

We met for a drink
And it was actually quite fun
But he was wearing Roberto Cavalli shorts
Then he said: let's go for a walk
And I said: ok
Then he said: let's go to this pub
So we got another drink
And then he said: let's go to this private garden

And the next thing
We are standing in front of his building
And I said: no, no, no, no, no
And he said: come on, come on
Ok, there was actually a garden in his building
So we sat there
Just talking and laughing

Then he said: I need to go to the toilet
And I said: ok, go I will wait for you
But he said: come with me
And the next thing
We are standing in front of his flat
And I said: no, no, no, no, no
And he said: come on, come on

He was really touchy feely
And he wanted to sit next to me
And I was scared he will want to kiss me
And he tried to kiss me
And I said: no, I don't want to kiss you
But he still tried
And then he said: let's go lie down on the bed

Omg, he was so annoying
And I was a bit tipsy
So I said
I'm going home
And after that I thought, so weird
He planned the whole thing
He thought I would come to his flat and have sex with him
Whatever

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