Wasteland

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Cozier

Cozier is a surname. more »

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I doh know
I wish somebody would hypnotise me now
To help me understand what was in my head when I was 15
Because when I was 15
I thought everybody over the age of 30 should just lie down in a coffin
And leave me alone
I didn't know it would happen to me and I'd become 62

Because I didn't know
I didn't even know what I wanted to be
I knew I could draw
And people said I could be an artiste but I didn't know what that was
So I had a lot of anger and a lot of confusion and a lot of alienation
I suppose I was distracted by trying to be cool
But I don't even know how successful I was at being that
I remember sometimes trying to think about wether there was a thing called a future or not
But it seemed empty it seemed like nothing

Like when I said what's the future it seemed like blank
And I suppose that had a lot to do with the fact that the way the society defined the future
And the way the future was taking shape
Were irreconcilable
You know like
I just couldn't get it
I mean I couldn't even articulate it
And I'm not even sure I trust what I'm saying now

Yeah
You know what I mean cause I'm much more articulate now I'm older
I have a future now
I still have a future I think
But back then
Living in Trinidad at that time
It didn't feel like you know
Everything felt like nothing
Right
But
Trinidad in fact

What's weird now
Is when I think of some of the things I've accomplished or done
I almost feel like pinching myself
Because I try to remember what it felt like then
But then I suppose it's just a repeating narrative
Every young person gets frustrated by the present

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