PROUD OF ME

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Faith Freeman

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I've been thinkin
I've been thinkin bout all the little things I couldn't live without
Used to be one of 'em thoughts
But now look at us
Went from inseparable to strangers overnight and it's all because
You couldn't keep it real if yo life on the line
Play innocent and I swear it mess with my mind
Said you ain't never switchin up but then you cashed out
And you would always have my back but if that's true then where you at now
Mad cause I expected to be over this
Mad because these people see me angry they ain't used to it
Feel like a fraud cause I'm not who they expect me to be
But why do I care they weren't there when I couldn't stand on my feet
I'm the one who picked myself up
Out those streets when I was fed up
And I know I should be dead
So I thank god that I still wake up
Pain in my eyes and all the hurt in my soul
Yet I still try to be soft
To keep from losing control
And that's real
I feel like they want something fake from me
Tryna paint a feeling you can't see
Do I gotta hide
How I'm feeling inside
Just for them to say they proud of me
Just for them to say they proud of me
Yeah yeah yeah
Just for them to say they proud of me
Just for them to say they proud of me
I could sit here paint a picture but I still don't think that it would ever feel like enough
Lil rough around the edges
But I learned to adjust
Desensitized to seeing people pass from overdosing
And half the people I grew up with gone they life was stolen
Maybe that's why I put myself in situations of life and death
Hold on or jump the fence
Tryna be the broken piece for people to mend they edge
To show 'em that it don't gotta be like that
Then feelin hypocritical cause I still feel so trapped in my own head
Sometimes I feel like I'm swimming in my thoughts
Surrounded by people say they love me but I feel lost
Dissociating from the damage that I hide from
Let people in but when they get close I still run
Yeah
I know that I do it
Got a fear of being abandoned so I still run
Yeah
And I still run
I'm proud of you
I'm proud of you
I am brave
I am beautiful
I am strong
Give me the muscles
Show me your muscles
Show me your muscles
Ooo say grr
Grrr
I love you
I love you Mommy

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