Gauze

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Bear Apartment

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I wrote you a letter I hope you never read
Your picture near my heart so you're last thing I will see
I replay your voice mail it gets better ever time
The sound of your sonnet ease my trouble mind
(Help me, Help me)
No, I don't want you to move on
But go if what we had is long gone
I understand the circumstance the cards left in your hand
Remember me in everything. I'll be your Guardian
I hope it's all for nothing and the dark clouds never come
When I battle with my demons from the things that I have done
And if I relapse back to habits I quit
Then sober me up and keep it all from my lips
(Help me, Help me)
So Please stay. I promise to get better
Please stay. I'm just under the weather
I don't blame you for leaving, but hope that you don't
I hope by this evening you pick up the phone
No, I don't want you to move on
but go if what we had is long gone
I understand the circumstance the cards left in your hand
Remember me in everything. I'll be your Guardian
I don't think you can comprehend the struggle deep within
All the wars fought and lost deep in the scars on my skin
There's no hiding from the abomination I've created in my head
So forgive me if sometimes I slip and scream "I wish I was dead"
but don't worry. I'll keep fighting this temptation
But I'm addicted to the sensation of emancipation from the living
Like I'm cast, in a vast ocean of regret and decisions
Like an unlit path in a labyrinth of self hate and affliction
But this nonfiction story doesn't have to end like this
Don't you misconstrued my vulnerability for weakness
I know I can overcome this darkness
Harnesses the hate in my heart that started it
Take all the good left in me and impart it
so maybe you can catch it early and stop it
I promise
I pinky promise
I'll die of natural causes

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