Ashtray

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owen yellow

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All my bad habits piling up till my back breaks,
All my insecurities they team up and attack me
All my bad decisions always lead me to the ashtray
All my favorite people seem to move right past me

You won't catch me vulnerable
I bottle up all of my thoughts until I can't no more
And then I'll sink into this alcohol
The bottles all I really need when I go fall apart
I'm so sorry I'm hostile, let me call you tomorrow
Right now I'm an imposter, my feelings aren't real
I'm supposed to be happy, always joking and laughing
Always wearing my mask, to hide whatever I feel

All my bad habits piling up till my back breaks,
All my insecurities they team up and attack me
All my bad decisions always lead me to the ashtray
All my favorite people seem to move right past me
All my good habits seem to go away, desert me
All my insecurities they turn around and hurt me
All my good decisions seem to screw me over some way
All my favorite people gonna f*ck me over one day

Someday soon, maybe I can get some help
Maybe I can meet a person with whom I'll share all my doubts
And we can, fend off all the shitty memories
That seem to haunt me from when I was seventeen
I got one, two three, four, monsters on my doorstep
Five, six, seven, eight drinks when I'm upset
Nine, ten, drop dead, gorgeous and misleading
I haven't been okay, since the day you said you're leaving

All my bad habits piling up till my back breaks,
All my insecurities they team up and attack me
All my bad decisions always lead me to the ashtray
All my favorite people seem to move right past me
All my good habits seem to go away, desert me
All my insecurities they turn around and hurt me
All my good decisions seem to screw me over some way
All my favorite people gonna f*ck me over one day

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