Words to Myself

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Aaron Rothko

5:26

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Early that morning, fluorescent lights started to spin
I'm in the background, just watching these thoughts pouring in
Let's all be honest, whose mind is a fortress
Whose walls don't fall down time to time?
But every last brick of resolve turns to rubble
As soon as they're looking at mine

Oh I don't believe in no god above
Just whispering words to myself
And I'm all but convinced, I think I might die
If I keep on drinking to my health

And as the day goes by
Here I lie
Heeding blind
Disorders

Not there when I'm needed, the places that I should've been
Sitting here helpless, I'm getting angry again
I've picked up the hobby of mulling it over
Replaying the spots where I've failed
This year has been torture, I'm stuck inside
Too scared to bite my own nails

Oh nothing is safe now, can't sleep in my bed
Wouldn't wish this on nobody else
I've washed my hands till they're all cracked and bled
Oh I'm getting sick of myself

Oh and now why can't I
Take my side?
Lord I tried
To compromise
Inner child
Is older

The wind on the corner is calling my name
And whispering secrets and passes the blame
And I swear to myself that it's keeping me safe
The spirit's controlling and I'm keeping my faith
So I stare at the ground to not me their eyes
That call me their equal, then skin me alive
Well they aren't misguided, they are perplexed
Well I am not focused, I am obsessed
And these words don't come easy but they're worse to evict
For they swing the gavel and make me convict myself
Over and over for a sabotaged mind
That would all go away if I could learn to unwind
But I won't let it go, no I can't face the facts
And I won't hear you out if I'm off of my tracks
Think that I'm underwater, my face is sore
The lows don't come often, but damn are they low

And not a day goes by
That's not a fight
Torn and tired
Of walking wire
World of mine
Is colder

 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer