Song parody of
Dr. Haines
by Chris Haines the King of Spain
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My daddy cuts the brains
That's why they call him Dr. Haines
He's lookin' for lymphomas
Before they give you comas (You can get more than one)
Sometimes he finds hair and teeth
Where they ain't supposed to be
I think that's called a glioblastoma
But I failed biology
I once scrubbed in and saw him shunt a baby
Head so big I thought it's full of gravy
But that shit inside it's called CSF
That's cerebral spinal fluid if you failed the test (Like me)
My daddy cuts the brains
That's why they call him Dr. Haines
He's lookin' for meningiomas
Before they give you comas (You can get more than one)
I asked my daddy any mistakes he had made
Any regrets he had while he was cutting away
I've got an ivy league degree in Sociology he said
Countin' all them sponges ain't my cup of tea
Well they call him Dr. Haines
Countin' sponges ain't his thang
If he calls you shit for brains
You best think twice it mightn't be alright (That's the opposite of Dylan)
My daddy cuts the brains
That's why they call him Dr. Haines
He's lookin' for lymphomas
Before they give you comas (You can get more than one)
Sometimes he finds hair and teeth
Where they ain't supposed to be
I think that's called a glioblastoma
But I failed biology
I once scrubbed in and saw him shunt a baby
Head so big I thought it's full of gravy
But that shit inside it's called CSF
That's cerebral spinal fluid if you failed the test (Like me)
My daddy cuts the brains
That's why they call him Dr. Haines
He's lookin' for meningiomas
Before they give you comas (You can get more than one)
I asked my daddy any mistakes he had made
Any regrets he had while he was cutting away
I've got an ivy league degree in Sociology he said
Countin' all them sponges ain't my cup of tea
Well they call him Dr. Haines
Countin' sponges ain't his thang
If he calls you shit for brains
You best think twice it mightn't be alright (That's the opposite of Dylan)
