Hate Your Guts

When I was 17, I wished I was 23 When I hit 23, I wished I was 17 Now I'm almost 29, I wish I was 85 It'd be statistically unlikely you'd be alive Because I hate your guts Shit I hate you so much I hope you suffer a small paper cut I hope your boss makes you stay for a half hour more Because I hate your guts And I wish I didn't love you anymore I hate the way you breath The stupid way you sneeze How does everything you eat end up stuck in your teeth? The way you steal the sheets when we go to bed As I guess there's a hole in the back of your head Because I hate your guts Shit I hate you so much I hope the battery dies on your phone I hope your favourite TV show fails to record Because I hate your guts And I wish I didn't love you anymore Wish I didn't love you (woah) Wish I didn't love you (woah) Wish I didn't love you Woah oh oh oh I hope when I'm out on tour you lose your keys to the door Because I hate your guts And I wish I didn't love you anymore Wish I didn't love you (woah) Wish I didn't love you (woah) Wish I didn't love you Woah oh oh oh So you must be mistaken if you wanna date me You'd be more respected if you were to hate me There's so many warnings you choose to ignore Because I hate your guts And I wish I didn't love you anymore I hate your guts