Song parody of
All Kinds of Kinds
by Miranda Lambert
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Ilsa was an acrobat who went and fell in love with that
Horatio the human cannonball
A wedding 'neath the big top tent with barkers clowns and elephants
Sideshow family oddities and all
The dog-faced boy howled out with joy
As the tattooed lady was crying
Ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds
Thomas was a congressman with closets full of skeletons
And dresses that he wore on Friday nights
Phyllis was a pharmacist, a dab of that, a pinch of this
Concocted to suppress her appetite
When the children were fiddlin' she'd slip 'em some Ritalin
And wait for Thomasina to arrive
Cause ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds, all kinds of kinds
When I play this old guitar from children's shows to smoky bars
I take a break and think about the past
When I stood up in geometry and everybody stared at me
And I tossed my test into the trash
I scratched off my number while hitching out under
That bush league population sign
Ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds
Now some point the finger, let ignorance linger
If they'd look in the mirror they'd find
That ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds
All kinds of kinds
All kinds of kinds
Ilsa was an acrobat who went and fell in love with that
Horatio the human cannonball
A wedding 'neath the big top tent with barkers clowns and elephants
Sideshow family oddities and all
The dog-faced boy howled out with joy
As the tattooed lady was crying
Ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds
Thomas was a congressman with closets full of skeletons
And dresses that he wore on Friday nights
Phyllis was a pharmacist, a dab of that, a pinch of this
Concocted to suppress her appetite
When the children were fiddlin' she'd slip 'em some Ritalin
And wait for Thomasina to arrive
Cause ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds, all kinds of kinds
When I play this old guitar from children's shows to smoky bars
I take a break and think about the past
When I stood up in geometry and everybody stared at me
And I tossed my test into the trash
I scratched off my number while hitching out under
That bush league population sign
Ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds
Now some point the finger, let ignorance linger
If they'd look in the mirror they'd find
That ever since the beginning to keep the world spinning
It takes all kinds of kinds
All kinds of kinds
All kinds of kinds
