My Baby Loves a Bunch of Authors

Well you should see my story reading baby, you should hear the things that she says, She says "Hon, drop dead, I'd rather go to bed with Gabriel Garcia Marquez." Uhh-huh! Cuddle up with William S. Burrows, leave on the light for Bell Hooks, I've been flirtin' with Pierre Burton 'cause he's so smart in his books I like to go out dancing, My baby loves a bunch of authors My heart's so broke and bleedin' Baby's just sitting there doing some reading So I started watching some TV, played my new cd player too, She said: "Turn it off or I'll call the cops and I'll throw the book at you." All this arguing made me get dizzy, called my doctor to come have a look I said: "Doctor hurry!" He said: "Don't worry, I'll be over when I finish my book" I like to go out dancing, My baby loves a bunch of authors We've been livin in hovels Spendin' all our money on brand new novels So I got myself on a streetcar and it drove right into someone, You know the driver said: "I was lookin' straight ahead!" But he was reading the Toronto Sun "So?" So my honey and me go to a counsellor to help figure out what we need She said: "We'll get your love growing, but before we get going, here's some books I'd like you to read." I like to go out dancing, My baby loves a bunch of authors Lately we've had some fricton 'Cause my baby's hooked on short works of fiction So we split and went to a party, some friends my girl said she knew But what a sight 'cause it's authors night and the place looks like a who's who Now I'm pounding the ouzo with Mario Puzo Who's a funny fella? W.P. Kinsella Who brought the cat? Would Margeret Atwood? Who needs a shave? He's Robertson Davies! Ondaatje started a food fight, salmon mousse all over the scene Spilled some dressing on Doris Lessing, these writer types are a scream! I like to go out dancing, My baby loves a bunch of authors We'll be together for ages Eatin' and Sleepin' and Eatin' and Sleepin' and Eating und Sleeping und Turnin' pages. Yeah!