I Wish I Could Sleep

I can't fall asleep Just don't like what I see in my dreams I'd rather sit and think of sad things So what's the point of getting no sleep I stay by myself It's just the way I've learned to live life Laugh when I'm hurt but say I'm alright So what's the point of having friends right? I wish I could sleep I wish I could sleep Get lost in my dreams Following my dreams Follow my dreams I wish I could sleep I wish I could sleep Get lost in my dreams Following my dreams Follow my dreams I didn't think about the future much Till' I started getting older Felt more weight over my shoulders Till' thinking became a time crutch I didn't think about my mom much And what it would be like If she was part of my life Sometimes I wish we could just have lunch Tell her everything that she missed But then I think about Why my mom is never around My eyes swell heart drops Then I hit my fist on the ground yeah Had a talk back Dealing with my old self yeah Cleaned off some my old shelves Now I've got a moment we should talk 'Cause I've been thinking quite a lot About some things that have been keeping me from Sleeping on and off I'm going off with it but I won't quit it 'Cause if I can't be myself in my own music Then the music is just music Then these lyrics could never start up a movement I wish I could sleep I wish I could sleep Get lost in my dreams Following my dreams Follow my dreams I wish I could sleep I wish I could sleep Get lost in my dreams Following my dreams Follow my dreams I can't help but to think about all the things that you said The way you twisted my thoughts And got inside my head Made me feel like a villain While you just played up the victim yeah Like I was lookin at my life through a prism I felt so angry inside I would hit my walls till' my hands would bleed I answered you're calls 'Cause I still thought that you cared for me It took so many nights of my crying To feel the pain had gone But I still play you're song Thinking maybe I was wrong I know that I was never perfect I've always felt I wasn't good enough And I deserved it When people tell me they'll be there for me Is when I start to really worry That's when the times go by and things get blurry 'Cause every time you let someone get close to you They always leave you cursing Guess I'm a victim of my own deserting Yeah And now I'm learning Why there is no one there to comfort me When I am hurting I wish I could sleep I wish I could sleep Get lost in my dreams Following my dreams Follow my dreams I wish I could sleep I wish I could sleep Get lost in my dreams Following my dreams Follow my dreams I think what my life would be like As someone else But that's another story Might be another hell But I am grateful though I've got a family who has spent the time to watch me grow Might have to take some notes Maybe for when I have kids of my own But I'm just using my music To do some self reflection Maybe who knows My music has the potential To send a greater message