Song parody of
FIVE STAR MEMOIRS (feat. ERROL HOLDEN)
by Rain910
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I'm at the Tambourine Room, beef tartare
Hidden under a blanket of caviar with a taste, that'll carry on
To the next course
Truffle pasta, paired with the perfect Bordeaux to overload my senses
Culinary perfection, my sections like a scene from Succession
Black ties and suits, seated in Le Coucou
This French bitch I chose to step with, made a pretentious entrance
We approached with grandioseness,
Groping her ass in front of old wealthy investors
Married men spill their wine, staring at her while sweating
Out there toupees, touche, it was a random Tuesday
Ordered the lemon crepe souffle and duck two ways
My five star memoirs, the sauce chef recommended, splendid
I arrived the hour before my reservation
They still happily seated me with no hesitation
Placing my phone down before I hit the restroom
The sink had gold handles and sweet almond hand soap
Let's dance slow to the live pianist, grab my hand its
Enough time before the food comes, the mood's young
The dishes we shared seemed taboo once,
Blue fin tuna and puffer fish
You fuck with this?
Spit it in your napkin if not, just do it decent,
Wash it off with the Riesling
This bottle is from New Zealand
Sweet, my five star memoirs,
Its all chef recommended, splendid
Silk tablecloths at the Waldorf, on top of it is beef stroganoff
And poached lake trout with egg sauce and parsley potatoes
My wardrobe is a silk black Celine pajama shirt
I'm eating alone, needed time to zone, from what my girl seen in my phone, I'm raunchy
I've been here for three weeks straight, they wanna comp me
I call the room, told her, listen here, come down, meet me in Bull & Bear
When you show, maintain a level of savoir faire, I leaned over and I asked
What are you having, low and slow, she whispered back
For beginners, I think the Wagyu Carpaccio
The waiter eased up and said, great choice
In a androgynous voice
then handed me a dessert menu
I laid it down and told him, headed to the men's room
To no surprise, she cut her eyes
Her hair cut short like Jamie Lee Curtis, my true lies caught up to me
Walked in the bathroom, the towel attendant said, what up to me
Five star memoirs
I'm at the Tambourine Room, beef tartare
Hidden under a blanket of caviar with a taste, that'll carry on
To the next course
Truffle pasta, paired with the perfect Bordeaux to overload my senses
Culinary perfection, my sections like a scene from Succession
Black ties and suits, seated in Le Coucou
This French bitch I chose to step with, made a pretentious entrance
We approached with grandioseness,
Groping her ass in front of old wealthy investors
Married men spill their wine, staring at her while sweating
Out there toupees, touche, it was a random Tuesday
Ordered the lemon crepe souffle and duck two ways
My five star memoirs, the sauce chef recommended, splendid
I arrived the hour before my reservation
They still happily seated me with no hesitation
Placing my phone down before I hit the restroom
The sink had gold handles and sweet almond hand soap
Let's dance slow to the live pianist, grab my hand its
Enough time before the food comes, the mood's young
The dishes we shared seemed taboo once,
Blue fin tuna and puffer fish
You fuck with this?
Spit it in your napkin if not, just do it decent,
Wash it off with the Riesling
This bottle is from New Zealand
Sweet, my five star memoirs,
Its all chef recommended, splendid
Silk tablecloths at the Waldorf, on top of it is beef stroganoff
And poached lake trout with egg sauce and parsley potatoes
My wardrobe is a silk black Celine pajama shirt
I'm eating alone, needed time to zone, from what my girl seen in my phone, I'm raunchy
I've been here for three weeks straight, they wanna comp me
I call the room, told her, listen here, come down, meet me in Bull & Bear
When you show, maintain a level of savoir faire, I leaned over and I asked
What are you having, low and slow, she whispered back
For beginners, I think the Wagyu Carpaccio
The waiter eased up and said, great choice
In a androgynous voice
then handed me a dessert menu
I laid it down and told him, headed to the men's room
To no surprise, she cut her eyes
Her hair cut short like Jamie Lee Curtis, my true lies caught up to me
Walked in the bathroom, the towel attendant said, what up to me
Five star memoirs
