Lifeline

You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody Turned the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing What you supposed to do, when you're scared to let anyone get close to you Afraid of the pain you put them through, that's all you knew It was just a matter of time, every time, everything was fine Inside looking for lifelines, instead of searching for minds that motivated the rhymes It's not hard to find, when you have hope, when you don't you broke Like a word unspoke, suppressing the cope, numbing with coke Two packs of smokes, pretend you dope, like the fake smile you crack When the pain's attached to your back, throwing hands at yourself attack Looking for a breath you can't grasp, looking for a hand you can't grab Looking for a mic you don't rap, and it's the only dream you ever had And you wonder why you always sad, it wasn't your dad or your car crash It wasn't the drugs or the too many thoughts you had, it was the wish you wanted so bad You knew you were something, but you weren't doing nothing Freestyles in the kitchen bluffing, only thing you were buzzing Was the drinks in your cupping, now look at me rapping Look at you clapping, I'm proud of myself, begging for help but I got well You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody Turned the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing If you truly listen to this, you know I got as dark as it gets Only reason I live, is because my faith held on to heaven's wish I had to make a shift, chasing my gift, if not I was done I was pulling the trigger, I wanted to live, but wanted death to come quicker 40 vikes and a bottle of liquor, why didn't he take me I fell asleep a sinner, woke up a winner, threw my pills in the trash for dinner Haven't took one since, never going back, I'm convinced My happiness is the evidence, everything else seems irrelevant I can't fail, I'm too intelligent, life is delicate, not definite So if you need therapy, find a specialist, don't be afraid of your mentalness Soldier your mind, a regiment, a true testament When you stand up and speak, vulnerability doesn't make you weak It makes you a man to me, I'm not fighting insecurities To fuel masculinities, masking my identity, I put em at ease Soldier, cause I am one, whatever comes I'm never done I've been through fucking hell, most I put through myself, but I got well You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody Turned the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing If this doesn't pick you up, I will Drive to your house, the bridge, wherever it is To make sure you're not just alive, you live, don't give in Reach deep, find your words, speak, reach your hand I'll meet, I'll hold you if you need it Your heart, you can beat it, your mind, you can feed it You are never defeated, keep breathing, keep seeking Keep meeting, everything you're dreaming We in this together, we teaming, I promise you I ain't ever leaving This is the demon I'm releasing, I just started steaming I can't help but start screaming, off the pain I'm weaning I needed this shit, so if you don't understand it Out my life, you live, I know my purpose I'm meant to take sadness and fix, empathetic a kid So when your pain hits, it puts me in the mix Scars don't make you sick, unless you let it weigh on your conscience Don't put your mind at risk, try to heal your inner critic When you in too thick, if no one ever tells you, listen to this You better than you admit, you better than you admit, you better than you admit You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody Turn the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing Thanks for watching