Heaven's Hotel Bar

Young folk, old folk, stillborn babes in arms They've left the mess, the strife and stress And now everything's quite calm But down the road there's a more raucous tone Where everyone seems to be a star Swilling ale and telling tales In Heaven's Hotel bar It's been a ride through hell to the pearly gates A burning spell of altered states So come on my sweetness, get on your feet 'cos There's a tale and a half to tell And it's your first day so fire away here at Heaven's Hotel And we want the moment before it all went dark When you felt every split second Before you gently slipped away or were ripped apart As your trip to the beyond beckoned And make sure you employ every detail We want to go ooh and ah Allow us to reel in horror or feel the sympathy and sorrow Yes, the way you went, your lament How you were heaven sent to us ladies and gents here at Heaven's Hotel bar You know, some don't even see it coming Bludgeoned, no warning no fear Crept up from behind and, wham, rendered blind And next thing they were on their way here And how would you face, winding up in this place Not looking so great but feeling fine 'Cos everyone's laughing; it's a perk of the passing From leaving their tough lives behind Yeah, everyone's laughing their heads off Even those with their heads off I'm talking decapitated They tell of the guillotine that sliced 'em so clean And the steps they go through to drink, I assure you, Are nothing short of awesomely captivating And the delicate child, taken by a crocodile Said she felt like she had been hit by a freight train But philosophically she spoke, saying although It was such a hideous and horrendous way to go She felt pleased to be at least an important piece of the food chain Oh, and, of course, there were those who totally froze Bracing for that moment of impact And then seeing their brains and scattered remains all about them Were amazed to see that their souls were still totally intact We're souls in the clear, all here, in good cheer Egging on the next tale of demise Even those who took the leap quietly in their sleep Give wonder to the rapturous rise As if lifted on high drifted into the sky Looking back at themselves as they flew Floating above a self that they loved Their body in state, lying in wait For the flames or the worms to consume Yes, there are so many ways to end your days Quiet releases, blown to pieces Burnt, frozen, drowned and poisoned Nailed, impaled, executed in jails All part of the macabre mix And then down to the harbour and across the Styx we sail And head for here with stories, clearly, that will never end And with so much coming from something in common It's not hard to form death-long friends And when some have had their fill, they simply head for the hills Or even to a yonder star But most hang in here for the tales and the beer In Heaven's Hotel bar Yeah, most hang in here for the tales and the beer In Heaven's Hotel bar