Lost Among the Stars

I been drifting and forever wishing I wasn't thinking of another picture I hope I never missed a mark I hope that I can love and fix my broken heart I think my state is stagnant I think the pain will come back if I relax Or maybe that is just the way I practiced Maybe making music was the way to patch it I took a leap and I left the planet Losing gravity and fencing madness Testing waters without a caution I'm gonna drown in sorrow if I falter Fall down the rabbit hole Spiral down and miss the whole of my youth I'm going through it, a big transition I got to stay committed lest I meet Charybdis Fall into that abyss and miss my happiness What trap is this? Am I made to live? Do I make it big? Why do I think of the illest things? I'm not sure if that's a good thing I've never hit anything more extreme than these mood swings I've never bit anything off more than I could chew I've been running and always trying to pull a stunt I can only hope I make it farther every time I jump I been distant and reminiscing Past relationships have got me tripping I see her face every day And she's the good one I was with How could she ever fade away? Comparison is how I hurt myself A seraphim of judgment, that's a war with hell Mind over matter, anxiety, a prison, a cell I'm kept cuffed to stuff I fucked with Reminded of all the people I'm done with Every night the compilation gets replayed Every time the combination is expressly laid The memories cut me like a deadly blade My emotional debts are getting well repaid Even then, with all depression, I haven't shed a tear Except for the loss of a love I have most revered And yet fate seems laid out in front of me I can't see a day where my two deaths Aren't there to comfort me The demons are winning Demons are winning I cross my heart Start my car And they're still pursuing I'm tired of running Tired of running Patience is something Tired of hunting Tired of struggling Loving for nothing I hope it's for someone And not where I come from Tired of running Dying of nothing Feel like it's something Daylight is tougher Night is a cover Providing me warmth At least there are stars that I can shoot for I pray that I can recover And not become lost among them Ain't that something I'm tired of running