O.G. Original Gamer

OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger" OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger" Dad found me on the steps of the video arcade Oprhan baby in a basket, seven pounds is all I weighed And before I learned to walk well I'd mastered Donkey Kong Q'bert, Final Fight, Master Blaster and Pong Blindfolded, okay, yeah, I know it sounds adorable But dollars signs in pop's eyes grew creepy and deplorable He said, "Play by the noises, follow the ding boing" But can I walk the dog and do my homework? First, collect coins Kid, didn't I find you with a controller in hand? Now why do you got to go and bring shame to your old man? Same to your old fans, you were a child prodigy Up on a milk crate at the cabinet, making cottage cheese Out of anybody'd put a quarter on screen My pride in you, extended like the limbs of Dhalsim All green money motives must a back seat take Put the textbooks down, I'm trying to make you great OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger" OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger" Locked in the attic I was trained from my crib to the stroller While dad beat me senseless with the NES controller Kid, listen, I promise, it's for your own good Wits that you've shown, should you level up? It's understood I hadn't been out since '98 like Sega Saturn I've been learning ten-hit combos and the speed run patterns More play, less chatter, you're a champion, kid Under your mattress there had better be some cartridges hid Up up down down left right left right B A, mad scary It's like Clockwork Orange meets Ray Bradbury It's unnecessary to struggle, you're fated to win But till you beat Bowser you stay strapped in I wanna live a fun life, I've only seen the sun twice I want real friends, dad, Nintendogs won't suffice Why do you ask for nothing when the world could be yours? Flesh and blood, fun's fleeting seek eternal high scores OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger" OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger" I wanna go to school and clean my room I don't wanna sit here playing Doom Three, can't you see I need to go out and play, yo Real sports like baseball, I'm sick of Halo Then you're sick of the meaning of life at your age Better try a little harder, you want to clear that stage And step into the middle of an existence examined Do it or you're grounded, make you play backgammon Here's a list of things that I'd rather do Than sitting home playing Super Smash Brothers with you Eat peas, do the dishes, walk the dog, mow the lawn Take your wii and shove it, I'm off pops, I'm gone, peace Don't Joust with me, kid, I'll go Berzerk After all of your talent, all of my hard work All the winnings that you earn, you're celebrity too You wanna put us on the streets like the TV movies do OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger" OG original gamer Sad as "Face of a Stranger"