The Carol of the Gammon and the Snowflake

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_Patrickconnor

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The most magical thing about Christmas 
Is an imposed proximity 
To ideals that are different from yours 
You say: 
"I think you're a whiny, entitled millennial" 
I say: 
"I think you've destroyed my faith in humanity" 
As we catch-up around the open fire 

You want to see the snowflakes fall 
It's a dream you've had for the longest time 
And all I want is a gammon to cure 
But I feel this boiling up inside of me 
A no-man's land of common ground to find 
It's a cease-fire insult kickabout, a game 
No Silent Night from both sides, it's Christmas Time 

You shout until you're red in the face
I pout, a perfect look of distaste
Without this common ground where would we be now? 
You say: 
"You snowflake, you socialist, you urban elite" 
I say: 
"You gammon, this selfish, patriotic conceit is awful" 
As we banter round the Christmas tree 

You want to see the snowflakes fall 
It's a dream you've had for the longest time 
And all I want is a gammon to cure 
But I feel this boiling up inside of me 
A no-man's land of common ground to find 
It's a cease-fire insult kickabout, a game 
No Silent Night from both sides it's Christmas Time

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