Decay

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Sebastián Rosa

4:45

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I thought a rose was beautiful
But I worry deep inside
I dread the day
It will decay
I fear the rose will die
Will you still remember me after I'm gone
You can't just expect me to live and move on
The love that I gave you
It made you so strong
Why'd you leave after so long
Thinking of why
Got so many questions
They don't believe in God 'til I shish-kebab the necklace
Criss cross the sevens
Split off the heavens from the Earth one of the worst mistakes oft' made
'Til this little light of mine flash mob grace
Tryna tack on faith in the face of oblivion
Shrugging off chains ducking saw blades chucking rocks straight I been stuck in a hard place yelling God save me
But it's all fake
Running and running from all my mistakes
Friends growing distant it's maybe too late I should call em and talk but my thoughts in the way
I do this for Ross
I do this for Donna and for Lloyd and for John
For those who we've lost
For those in the Fog
For DOOM and for Pun and for Steez and for Sean
For Mac and for L and for Biggie and Pac
I'm swearing to God,
Walk on my path 'til it tear me apart
Bury my heart in Brașov
The home of my mother who since I have lost
Sins of the Father get passed to his spawn
Shatter the glass into shards
Mirrors and smog
Pick up the pieces and try to move on
Dreams in the marrow of bones
Moment too late so just leave me
Alone
And scared to leave my home and roam around the globe with songs on replay
What he say
What she say
Man forget it
All these thoughts exhibit a fake life for me
It's a sight to see what I see
Am I free
No you're not
Got what others thinking battling your heart
How do I start being carefree
How do I know the kin around me are there for me, how do I
Imma stop you right there, focus on yourself and never go back,
Never lack the confidence I know you got it
Never let another man take your spot
And understand your the only one playing your part
So never stop
Never stop
Never stop
Never stop
Betting on yourself
Focus on your health
And tryna get yourself out that cell called life
And keep on tryna to evolve like On Sight
You're on right
I guess
Nah, I need more energy, you're on right
Yes
I'm on like K.Dot, it's in my DNA
On like Tyler
Not scared of what I say
Who I offend
And the loss of friends but deep down I should worry more
Thats the cycle of anxiety a constant war
Should I worry about myself or soar for the image
I'm battling between freedom and a life sentence
I'm gone
I'm gone
I'm gone
Can't settle with it
Indefinitely stoned like I'm sedimented
I don't even wanna know whenever this will end
Man I should move on but I'm lost
A tentative blend
See don't wanna let go I suck at goodbyes
Don't ever wanna lose sight of your eyes
Now I'm just lying here rolling the dice
Rolling the dice
Thinking of if you will
Will you still remember me after I'm gone
You can't just expect me to live and move on
The love that I gave you
It made you so strong
Why'd you leave after so long
Life
And the anxieties that come with it
Almost make it as if it's not worth it
Alright
I been asking questions that'll make god angry
Heard em on the daily
Still going crazy
Don't know how to feel
Didn't choose to be real
I just woke to the sounds and the sights
Now I got these pains nestled right near my eyes
And I just can't
Man I just can't feel safe
Any damn day could be the one
That's why I'm sewn to my love
And if we run, we run
There's more to this
So much more to this
Even taking the bus go to the store and shit
It's just nice to exist but the flip of it is
I can't ever feel comfortable
How wonderful
To see your face
But I know someday
Man I know someday
I don't wanna think like that so I won't
I don't wanna bring that tone so I won't
Just wanna hold you close just know
I'll be there from now to the end
I'll be there from now to the end man
Always
Always man yeah always
Man it never goes as planned
I gotta clear my head
I need to make amends
Yeah always never feels right to pretend
So I feel everything and it's like its the end yeah
Always
Every time you go away
Always seeing your gorgeous face
I wanna make it through the storm
While the boat gets laid to waste
I wanna be like an anchor that holds you in place
I wanna be everything that you want
I want to take every drop of your love
I wanna be with you until we're dust
But I do not know what i'd do if i had to see you walk away or decay
I have nothing to lose
I have nothing to prove
I would just bid adieu and blast off to the moon
I'd just jump off the roof
Turn the rope to a noose
Or the gun gonna shoot

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