can't find the words

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Iskwirel

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I woke up I
Pack my suitcase
I realize it's a case full of disappointment
I move through life with some pessimistic motions
I used to feel so oriented
But now I sit back
Simply try not to kick that
Why is a bucket in my distance
Now I get that
Why is it in some morbid code
Try to relax
Do really wanna go
I haven't relapsed

You think this is a better way
That method has a lot at stake
I know you feel that suffocation
Hands around your neck
Wanna rip out your insides
Can't give up just yet
There will be better days
Is that what you were told
I know what you would say
My mind has two halves
I try to fight back
My knuckles are bleeding
Please try to see me
I'm screaming out
I'm asking for help
Joke about it cause I can't get it out my mouth
The silence grows loud
Where am I now
I can't fucking do this can't figure it out

No
I'm not letting go of you that easily
I'm not letting that side win
That's my final plead
Throw me behind bars
And that's okay with me
So
What I need you to know
Is that you're needed
People need to care for you despite feeling defeated
You not left by windows
Hoping they'll see in

Had some trouble trying to breathe
I'm scared you'll see that part of me
If you were standing in front of me
I couldn't find the words
I have been feeling so weak
Not so strong
Losing that part of me
I need you right here next to me
But I can't find the words

I can't do it
I can't do this
I don't really think I'll get through this
I don't think I'm enough I have bruises
I can't do it
I can't
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