On Being a Woman

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Temitop

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Loose woman, one without virtue
Slut, unmarried, barren, worthless
These are adjectives constantly thrown at women like sharp edged pebbles
In a bid to cut open their skins
They often say "oh being a woman is so easy"
You have everything
There is nothing for you to worry about
Today, I will tell you what it is like
To be a woman

Being a woman is constantly wiring, rewiring and modifying yourself to this question
"Don't you know you are a woman"
It is to not speak until spoken to
And when she doth speak, she is called lousy and uncouth
Being a woman is feeling like a foreigner in bodies you've known your entire life
Conflicting who you are supposed to be with who you really are
It is hating your body and trying to mold, reshape
And fit into society standard of beauty
Yet falling short
While being held under a microscope and judged by your body shape
Too fat, too slim, too tall, too short, too tall, too dark
"She's only pretty 'cause she is fair"
It is being told your beauty would fade as your biological clock click and clacked
Like it was suspended by a dangling chain above your head
Diminishing your value as a market commodity

Being a woman is being seen as an object that belonged in the bedroom
A notch to a bedpost
While being told that the bodies you are still learning to understand
Wasn't yours to begin with
As your entirety was taken out of man to make you
You are nothing
But a rib pulled forth from another
A backbone to keep him upright
It is being told to tamper down your confidence, your standards, your expectations
Or you'll never find a mate
Being a woman is having to worry about walking at night
For fear of not just your property being stolen
But of being defiled and defeatedly beaten
Not like the day was any better or safer
From the stranger on the bus
Who rubs his genitals against you
Making you hate your body
And why it attracts such creatures
It is knowing that this vile act can still happen
In the confides of the place you call sanctuary
By those you call uncle, father, brother, lover
Touching you in places you call sacred
Desecrating you in your own sanctuary
Causing the ache between your thighs
As the flower in you wilts
While you are silenced from speaking up
Exchanging sex for grades; sex for grace
To get a degree or to get to a degree in life

Being a woman is being told you are the problem
If only you could have done better; cooked better; looked prettier
Then he wouldn't have wandered yonder
It is being told to be good, to be virtuous
To hold the flower between your legs so they do not blossom
It is hearing these questions from spittled lips
"When are you going to get married?"
"Don't you know you're getting old?"
"When are you going to have a baby?"
"Are you going to give your husband a son?"

But I say to the woman
Dear woman
Being a woman is not a universal definition
It is specific to each woman in herself
In her uniqueness; in her worth
You identify as you
It is not just mother, sister, auntie or friend
It is you
Woman you are life; you are a force
You carry within you the soil into which life springs forth
You hold in your womb the power of life
The future of humankind
It is knowing you are not a victim but a victor
A woman is not a man
But rather a creation of God
Because he knew the man couldn't function or exist without you
You are called a backbone but what is a human without a spinal strength?
See your emotions do not make you weak
They only make you feel deeply
Because you are the still waters
The peace to the chaotic rib cage you were pulled out from
Being a woman is not letting society define you
But letting God define you

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