I Didn't Do It

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John Joseph Ray

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I had two turtles when I was four
I left ‘em on the window sill to explore
With the window wide and 4 floors high 
They jumped right out without a bungy cord

Then Mom came home
She said, “Where are the turtles – What happened here?”
I said, “I didn’t do it”, as I shed a tear
They must’ve run away –when I was out to play
I didn’t do nothing, ‘cause I’m OK”

Back in school I had my fun 
I had all the teachers there on the run
And then I wrote and affectionate note
To every girl in my class, said every one

Then the principal came in
She said, “Who wrote these notes – I’m a’ holding here?”
I said, “I didn’t do it”, as I shed a tear
“They wrote them themselves was all I could say
I didn’t do nothing, ‘cause I’m OK”

I married the woman – of my dreams 
Things were perfect – or so it seemed
She got upset – when I went in debt 
For giving all our money to the slot machines

Then she pointed to me
She said, “Where is the money – Did it disappear?”
I said, “I didn’t do it”, as I shed a tear
“A one-armed bandit must’ve took it away 
I didn’t do nothing, ‘cause I’m OK”

I got me a job doing what I do best 
Working as a politician in Congress
The voters believed – what I said I’d achieve 
But then I forgot all my promises

Then the reporters wrote
“He lied everyday – in his career”
I said, “I didn’t do it”, as I shed a tear
“I’m so dismayed – by that expose 
I didn’t do nothing, ‘cause I’m OK”

One day I died and met up with God 
I tried to distract Him with my friendly façade
I turned on the charm and said I meant no harm 
When I stole money from the church collection pot

He just smiled at me
He said, “I know what happened, and so do you
You’ve completely forgotten how to say what’s true
Get ready for the reruns – of all that you’ve done
Your life ‘ll flash before your eyes until you do
Your life‘ll keep flashing right before your eyes
Over and over until you do""

 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer