Crony Capitalism Will Not Be Tolerated

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Dominic Frisby

Dominic Frisby (born September 1969) is a British author, comedian and voice actor. He is best known as co-host of television programme Money Pit. more »

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People say we live in a capitalist society and that capitalism has gone wrong
We don't live in a capitalist society, we live in a crony capitalist society
Libertarians preach tolerance
We tolerate others views, we tolerate their speech, we tolerate their behaviour
But there is one thing we do not tolerate. And that is crony capitalism
And come the revolution, crony capitalism, in all its forms, will be thrown into the dustbin Of oblivion

You will not have to pay 360 quid to get a return train ticket from Manchester to London
Because crony capitalism will not be tolerated
You will not have to come up with two million quid to buy an ordinary house built 150 Years ago for an ordinary working man and his family
Because crony capitalism will not be tolerated
You will not leave university fifty grand in debt while the vice-chancellor's on half a Million a year
You will not have to pay for Donald Trump's golf carts
Or Gary Lineker's salary
Or Jean-Claude Junker's wine
Or for their trips to Davos
Because crony capitalism will not be tolerated
Nick Clegg will not be paid millions to lobby governments to grant special favours to Facebook
There will be no revolving door between government, corporation, bank and regulator
Huawei will not land juicy government contracts cos half its board of directors used to Work for the government
HS2 will not cost 5 billion quid before a track has even been laid
Because crony capitalism will not be tolerated
You will not be able to donate to political parties then get knighted and a seat in the House of Lords
Mega corporations will not exploit planning laws you cannot comprehend
To build apartment blocks of unfathomable ugliness across your once beautiful city
To provide accommodation for people who never even go there
Actors with Hollywood salaries, succulent voices and silk scarves will not  march on Downing Street
To demand more subsidy for the arts
There's enough wank in the theatre as it is. Get your heads out of your anuses
Crony capitalism will not be tolerated
You will not get financial advice from your mate who thinks he's a business genius cos He happened to buy a house 30 years ago
You will have to pay taxes while landowners can get subsidies
You will not be able to invent spurious afflictions, play the victim card and then demand Special favour
You will not be able to spread shit about climate change
And then implore governments to spend billions fighting climate change, most of which Ends up in the pockets of the CEO
You will be able to cite specious data, demand  the economy be shut down and then Expect to carry on being paid

Pressure groups will not be funded by tax-payers
Banks will not be bailed out
House prices will not be propped up
The BBC will not be mandatory
There will be no corporate lobbying
There will be no special interest groups
Protectionism of any kind will not exist
Governments will not close down economies
There will be no central planning
There will be no central banking
There will be no government waste
There will be no fiat currency

Crony capitalism will not be tolerated
Crony capitalism will not be tolerated
Crony capitalism will not be tolerated
Because where there is no government, there can be no crony capitalism
And in Libertaria there will be no government

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