Conversation Concerning the State of Suicide in Our Society
The Attackbots
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Hello, welcome Yes, this song has lots of intense suicidal stuff So I mean you're welcome But you're also welcome to skip this because You know, we mention cops at one point and Yeah, it's, it's an intense time So yeah Here it is Why do we have to die alone I've got a better idea for how we can record it We can do alternate lines Okay, but going on Why do we have to die alone Here's your baked beans Right, thank you for my baked beans I'll get the noodles ready Thank you We die alone because it's illegal For you to be with us when we die So we don't invite you to our deaths We die alone I'm very grateful for your baked beans So I think actually Heinz Those small pods from Heinz Yeh Are a really good mental health food Which is why I'm trying to advertise them right now Do you know what I think you're, I think you're saying the truth What Molly You used to be so obedient I really do I see why Roisin liked these Yeah They're actually really tasty I think I actually made Roisin a whole bowl of them That was the impressive thing Oh wow Well I made myself one of these I think yesterday or today And it really helped just sort of get nutrients Or whatever they are into my system And that was good See what's going to happen is This is going to probably end up being quite a long track And I'll just record some cool music around it Sweet And it'll be fun Sweet So we just need to basically ignore that it's on Until you're finished eating them And then we'll just work through it together Hello there Cause, correct me if I'm wrong But it didn't really sound like you knew what you were saying each time Mm-mm, I did not But I think a sort of dialogue would work better Yeah it would work a lot better, I agree with you But like I said, I need to eat something before Yes, yes, yes If that's okay Naturally Oh, the shit noodles are almost ready Thank you Sigh, yeh, I want this, like I'm beginning to want this album to be more like something that you just like It's like something you have on and you just spend time with And it feels like you're hanging out with the people in the album Yeh that makes sense Like, we're not performing at you We're just, um, we're just sort of living with you But not I don't know how to say it I understand, I understand Right Um, this is very important, so um 'Cause I don't think I've ever heard anyone say it The words I'm about to repeat are not improvised I am being very precise when I say the following About society's fucked up way of treating suicidal people Suicide, bleh How is our society fucked up in the way it treats us It judges us for starters Society is deeply hypocritical It complains that we traumatize people When they find our bodies or see us killing ourselves But you offer us no alternative way to die Yeh But like, like, argh Every way you try to kill yourself people are like Oh you can't do that because people will find you And it's like the let me die in some sort of officially sanctioned way Where I don't have to do that, you don't Yes, I agree, I fucking agree Is there any way to die selflessly With regards to rules with society F*ck your hypocrisy You say you would sooner put in place better mental health services Yeah right Yeah They don't exist as far as I know anyway But you don't campaign for that do you It's just, the people who say this don't campaign for it They just, they don't vote for it or anything They're just like, you know I just believe that we should invest more in that Rather than being like, okay let's invest more in that So we don't have to legalise euthanasia Like, they're just inconsistent And that inconsistency throws people like me non-fatally under the bus Which is the wrong kind of way I want to be thrown under the bus Yeah, yeah, yeah That makes sense even though we are laughing it makes total fucking sense Which means from our end you're just being a cunt infested asshole Because we're still left with no way to die well What were you gonna say I was gonna say people are cunts They really are and it's not because they mean to be cunts It's because they don't realise That their meaning well means that we suffer horribly And also that our loved ones suffer horribly Amen And you sit there expecting us to put all the effort into staying alive How do we do that I don't know, don't ask me I'm chronically suicidal as well Like, you have to be so inventive to not Kill yourself Yeh, like, I've come up with so many ideas I know, me too Really elaborate ones Oh same Just to stop myself from killing myself And people don't Appreciate it They don't appreciate it and they don't help you with it much No, they really don't The psychiatric services give up on you pretty quickly if you're suicidal Egh, that's a friggin' understatement They don't say that explicitly but it is what happens I mean the fact That I've been in and out of A and E three times at least this week Speaks for itself Er, and you've been discharged Mm-hm Every single time Seriously Yeah Never in the ward once Nope Three attempts in one week Yep, it's a joke Yeah Shout out to the, what's it even called The Royal Infirmary, that place The Royal Infirmary It's not that royal I've not had the pleasure Yeh good Keep it that way Yeh, I'm just staying in Partick Yeh, just, just do that Just end up at the QEH They might actually treat you nicely Well they don't treat me at all at the moment apart from giving me meds It's, it's still nicer than the Royal Yeah, I know F*ck you What Just 'cause you get treatment I don't Thought you got Dr. Easton He doesn't do anything, if I say That's more than I get I try and get psychoanalysis and they're like Ah he'll think too much about it, and then I And then they don't give me CBT either Even though it's like seventy five percent effective for everyone Surely that's, is that not the No they haven't tried any sort of therapy on me or anything They've sorted of talked to me and suggested things like Have you considered not dying, and stuff like that But they haven't really Like basically I just turn up to Dr. Easton's office And I say how I've been doing Okay And then he's like, cool, keep doing what you're doing, and uh Really Oh yeah, every single time Usually What planet does he live on Very rarely he sometimes gives advice Like, don't do weed That thing that's been sort of stopping you from killing yourself recently And what does he recommend Don't do weed That's the thing he recommends That's the alternative Coz that solves all things And, and why do we have to die alone It's very isolating being suicidal Because people find it too draining to be around you If you're too truthful with people And people will stop you trying to Well they'll try to stop you killing yourself If you're too truthful to them So you end up not letting people know quite how vicious it is for you That's true It's like, you can never let people too close because then they'll just In case they If they get too close then they'll just start calling the cops on you Yeah, I was just about to say that, yeah 'Cause, like, although I don't kill myself every day Yeh I, at the moment You think about it Like, I make the decision to, at least at the moment, every day Yeh So it's like if someone were to be in our minds They'd realise quite how dangerous it was Yeah, it makes sense to me It's purely 'cause I completely understand where you're coming from I've been in a suicidal state since I was, what, ten years old Oh I was suicidal then as well I don't count that Yeh Why do we have to die alone Why do we have to die alone Why do we have to die alone We die alone because it's illegal for you to be with us when we die So we don't invite you to our deaths We die alone We die alone The scripted part is finished Why do we have to die alone I wanted to make the music for this so good Guess I failed at that We have to Unless we do it with a Like, have another suicidal person come along with us Because they understand how horrible it is to
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