Don't Wanna Feel

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Lamar Towles

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I don't pop pills so I be tryna drink my pain away
Clouds get hella dark so I assume it's goin be rain today
Sun was shining bright until my head start doing 88
Thoughts been racing hard for bout a year so now I'm hear to say
I lost my desire and then soon followed my drive
I lost hella people who always was by my side
Slowly losing myself and I'm constantly asking why
No use in getting help I'm just fighting to stay alive and that's true shit
No matter what I do my ass get set back that's straight facts
Lost time for shit that I would never do and I hate that
Drowning all my sorrow in a stupid fucking bottle
Only pain I wanna feel when I don't chase that
Hardest part is waking up
Depression sting just like a bee and I can't make it up
My mind grow weary as I think sometimes it keep me up
Look in the mirror at myself sometime the tears goin flow regardless
Wish that I could just be heartless I don't wanna feel
I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I'm tryna keep it real
I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I'm tryna keep it real
1 Shot, 2 shot, 3 shot, 4
Black out reset 4 shots more
4 Shots, 3 shots, 2 shots, 1
That's all it would take to pull the trigger and be done
I'm fighting contemplation
Sometimes I wonder is it best if I remain complacent
Don't wanna feel the pain no more so I continue drinking
These thoughts be biting at the neck I feel the teeth be sinking
The weight I feel is creeping
Ain't been the type to ask for help so I just wrote down my though
I found a beat and made a track Sharing my journey and loss
Crazy to think that all my friends be asking me for advice
But how the hell do I help you when I'm still crying at night
Questions we all ask
Who got my back when I fall down and shit is all bad
I cry for help but no one hears so I remain sad
In constant battles wit myself I only wrote this song today
To take some stress of off my health cause I don't wanna feel
I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I'm tryna keep it real
I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I'm tryna keep it real
I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel, I'm tryna keep it real

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